LeadershipConneXtions

Stout Monks (Miriam Philips)

Here is a delightful post from Miriam Phillips borrowing an idea from Benedict and his Order.  Thanks for this great insight and encouragement.  Stoutly yours,  -bkr-

p.s.  For readers who are relatively new to this blogsite, if you would like to read previous posts from Miriam, go to the Categories group in the left hand column and click on Miriam Phillips for all her posts.

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A couple of weekends ago, I was privileged to sit informally with several senior missions leaders and church-planters.  Two of them began to tell us about being members of the Order of the Stout Monks.   They explained how they meet for several days each year for guided probing prayer and sharing aimed at keeping them on a course in their personal and public lives that honors God. As they told how they have found an abbot to guide them in this, I suddenly realized where their name came from—which they confirmed.  The sentence that the phrase “stout monks” comes from is legendarily an addition to the Order of Saint Benedict. It reads like this:

 

“If any pilgrim shall come from distant parts with wish to dwell in the monastery, and will be content with the customs of the place, and does not by his lavishness disturb the monastery but is simply content, he shall be received for as long as he wishes. If, indeed, he shall find fault with anything, and shall expose the matter reasonably and with the humility of charity, the Abbott shall discuss it with him prudently lest perchance God hath sent him for this very thing. But, if he shall have been found contumacious during his sojourn in the monastery, then it shall be said to him, firmly, that he must depart. If he will not go, let two stout monks, in the name of God, explain the matter to him.”

 

These Christian leaders are committed themselves to be held accountable for the next 10 years by the “stout monks” in their group:  6 high level leaders that have come to know them well.

• Here are a few reflection questions well worth pondering and then acting on:
• Who in my life has permission to set me straight to “explain the matter” when I don’t “get it”?
• Who hears my story fully enough to discern if I am in need of further explanation?
• Might I need a group as deeply committed as these men to carry out the vision that God has given me?
• What might I be able to do to be a catalyst for my own version of the Order of Stout Monks?

 

Miriam Phillips
Amsterdam, Holland

A Prayer of Gratitude and Faith

Miriam Phillis recently sent me this prayer, which has been speaking to her.  It moved me as well, so I asked if I could post it and she said yes. 

On this Lord's Day, this prayer is a good one to offer; and perhaps do a little lectio divina reflection over.

For all that has been: thank you. 
 For all that will be: yes.
 Dag Hammarskjold

 

 Miriam Phillips
Amsterdam, The Netherlands

Leading Artists (Miriam Phillips)

Miriam Phillips writes, this month, about the artistic community and how one leads artists. Miriam has worked with many artists throughout the years and has been a part of a local church community that has many innovative, artistic types. Plus, she is married to a wonderful artist, theologian, evangelist and all round good guy, Bob.  Miriam, thanks for your post.  -bkr-

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Creativity, visual art, innovation, out-of-the-box thinking...

As leaders, if we are tracking points of contact in a rapidly shifting culture, we are learning to value these artistic elements in our ministry and business roles. But valuing these elements and learning to lead the ones who best contribute them are two different matters.  

Helping the artists, designers, visionaries, counter-intuitives, divergent thinkers themselves, who bring these elements to our dreams, projects, and teams, requires more than superficially valuing the useful products they provide for our focused goals. These voices have traditionally been marginalized in efficient organizations--too much chaos, too little goal orientation, a waste of precious time and resources without assurances that the investment with end up boosting our bottom line (whether it be financial profit or ministry fruitfulness). The creative process itself, and connecting this process to larger shared vision, requires a different kind of leadership than is needed to create focus in reaching other kinds of objectives. 
 

Check out the link to this excellent article about the process from Harvard Business Review by Chris Bangle, then director of design at BMW, in his role of “mediating between corporate and artistic mindsets”. (This discussion was first called to my attention a number of years ago in the intro to the helpful book Coaching Across Cultures by Philippe Rosinski.)

The article by Chris Bangle.

He believes that his three most important functions as a leader of creative people are to:

ONE:  Protect his team from unproductive feedback from other parts of the organization.

  

TWO:  Safeguard the artistic process (providing state-of-the-art tools and unhurried, undisturbed space to experiment with them, and shielding from pressure to shift too soon to possible limitations, whether financial or logistical).
 

THREE:  Be innovative in communicating with less artistically inclined people in the organization, mediating at the intersection of art and strategic goal orientation, drawing attention to the shared satisfaction of an excellent product, advocating for innovative proposals that may need retooling to be useful, and educating other parts of the organization about the creative process.
 

I’ve come to love this metaphor from the article about how the various parts of an organization can work together like gears:
 

The creative team, the production team and the financial team (or design, engineering and business teams) are like “three meshed gears.  If the gears are separated and spinning solo, nothing happens.  If the gears turn the same way, they freeze up.  They have to be interconnected and turning in opposite directions. But as we rotate we transfer power to one another...communication is the grease that keeps the gears engaged and running smoothly.”

 
 Miriam Phillips
 Amsterdam, The Netherlands

Blog: Word Clouds for Leadership Processing (Miriam Phillips)

I love beauty and color and visual representations of precious truths. This left me a prime target for a new addiction (or may I call it a hobby?) of creating instant `word clouds´ or `tag clouds` (a visualization of word frequency in a text).  The website for this is to be found at www.wordle.net.  The thought of generating uses for word clouds for training and coaching settings is only whetting my appetite for more.

Check out this link to see what happened when I entered the text of the first chapter of Ephesians, limited it to the 50 most-used words, eliminated common English words in one click, played with the color palette and tried out a couple of dozen quick-click layouts.

http://www.wordle.net/gallery/wrdl/875624/Ephesians_1_with_50_words

 

Or this with one of the fruit of the Spirit created in less than a minute

http://www.wordle.net/gallery/wrdl/875716/Fruit_of_the_Spirit

 

Putting in the mission, vision and values statement of our church was very revealing as the words used the most often appear in larger type—a great less-cognitive-than- average exercise for working with such weighty documents. This was great for an introduction to people seeing the documents for the first time.  Using the words in the first chapter of our leadership training materials came up with the word ´leadership´ in bold type, as expected, but I needed to think about the fact that the words ´God´ and ´Jesus´ were in smaller type.  No specific conclusions, but it did make me ask some questions I hadn´t formulated in that way of before.

It´s a shame that it is complicated to save your creation on your PC, but with a Mac you can press the print button and then click on PDF to create a saveable file. You can always access your image from the website and print in out, so, with a bit of forethought, the technique is flexible enough for most applications.

So the last few days I´ve been using this for important Bible texts for my leadership training.  I´ve made creations of the life purpose statements of my coaching clients.  I have plans to use it for poetry accompanying a gift.

Hope you have a chance to try out the potential of this unique tool.  Enjoy!

Miriam Phillips
Amsterdam, the Netherlands

p.s.  This link is for a service that makes your word cloud into a T-shirt!! 

http://ilikeellipses.com/category/blogging/
 

Not Soliciting for God's Job (Miriam Phillips)

Strogly gifted, highly competent, passionately driven leaders - you certainly will benefit from reading Miriam's post. And all the rest of us will also. For we all struggle with this issue Miriam names and describes so well.  Brian
 

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I might as well make a poster of this:

 

FOR THE JOB OF GOD

THERE ARE CURRENTLY

NO VACANCIES

 

 

This is more difficult to remember than you’d think--especially in times of crisis.  Things that are out of control tend to bring out all my latent control-freak tendencies. 

 

 

“Soliciting for God’s job”, focusing on goals that only God can achieve, is a huge waste of the precious time and emotional and physical stamina God intended to be spent on making the contribution that I have been given the resources to make. These resources are like the manna for the tasks he has given me for this day. I’ve been given no grace from God to spend on solving what only God is able. (This is akin to Brian’s blog about boosting our happiness by writing a list of all the things I am anxious about and crossing off all of the items I can’t do anything about.  You can read that post by clicking here. )

 

I am thankful that we have a lifetime of knowing God’s faithfulness behind us. These rules of engagement in troubled seasons have stood the test of time: Realize that changing other people is never on my God-given list of goals.  I am sometimes given the goal of influencing, but never the job of changing others.

 

Gauge carefully my balance of giving out in proportion to my filling up on spiritual nurture.  Free up time in my schedule for extended times of prayer and meditation on Scripture when I am running dry.  All of the spiritual disciplines I’ve learned to use to connect to God’s abundance are much-needed channels for me now.

 

Do whatever I need to do to keep letting God’s voice speak louder in my thoughts and have a deeper impact on my heart than all of the other voices around me, however emotional and pressing they may seem.  (Even my view of the sun can be blocked by one little finger if I hold it close enough to my eye.) Extra time for spiritual nurture helps with that, but I also need to take a break throughout my day to get perspective and to meditate on God’s greatness and goodness and on His promises.  Sometimes I need to limit the kind of contact I have with negative people.

 

Remember that  “the only thing that counts is faith expressing itself in love”  (Gal. 5:6b).  I don’t have to be anxious about knowing exactly what to do or if I’ve done the exact right thing.  I need to focus first on my motives and encourage others to do the same and be intentional about lining up my actions with my heart.  The Bible says that is the only thing that really counts.

 

Never make a decision or formulate a response out of fear.  Doubt is less the enemy of faith than is fear.  Get the faith issues straight, and then act with courage and be willing to be bold in the service of others. Remember that sometimes the biggest faith contribution in a situation is to be a “ non-anxious” presence in the face of the turmoil around me.

 

Be passionate about being a channel of God’s redemptive purposes in a fallen world. Even if the worst outcome I can think of actually happens, God is able to redeem it for His purposes. And God’s purposes have never been to keep me comfortable. It is enough if I can see His “grace operating in my life.” (From Eugene Peterson)

 

Miriam Phillips

Amsterdam, The Netherlands

Heart Soaking: Loosening What Grips Me (Miriam Phillips)

Miriam Phillips goes back to an old memory to find a beautiful metaphor for the inner life of leadership. Her reflection brought back a lot of memories for me, for I was one of those collectors she talks about and I did all the things she describes.  I hope you will find her imagery as moving as I did.  Brian

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When I was a little girl, my big brother collected postage stamps.  This hobby was less individual than a modern hobby like playing online games or listening to music on an IPod.  Even a little sister could save exotic stamps for his collection from the letters we received from missionaries.  I could help by carefully tearing off the corner of the envelope and prepare the stamps to be soaked off the envelope in a bowl of warm water. (Remember lick-and-stick stamps?)

 

Pulling the stamps from the envelope without soaking would have damaged them, even though it would have been quicker. Not removing the bits of envelope on the back would make it impossible to mount them neatly in the collector’s album, the pride and joy of every young collector.

 

 

So I helped to put the newest additions to the collection in a bowl of warm water, and after 10 minutes we easily separated the stamps from the envelopes and put them on a towel to dry. Then we would press them flat and mount them with the other stamps with specialized hinged stickers … all for the delight of my brother.

 

 

Sometimes my heart gets attached to certain ways of thinking and to certain issues…much like the stamps were thoroughly attached to the envelopes.  Maybe the attachment was even good and served a purpose at one point. But the heavier my leadership responsibility is, and the more potential I see in the opportunities before me, the greater the tendency of my heart to get stuck to my ministry instead of to my God.  I can get gripped by pride when things go well or to get stuck in anxiety and shame when they go poorly.  The deeper the crisis in my circumstances, the more my heart and mind need to be free to hear God’s voice--but the more stuck I get, the harder it is to shake the hold of that negative “inner dialog” that sometimes feeds me perspectives other than God’s.

 

It is a part of growing in leadership for me to attend to the state of my heart as it is affected by my leadership situations. My leadership demands that I do the work it takes to keep my heart single and focused.

 

 

Personalized from 1 Chronicles 29:14, I could say that I need “an uncluttered and focused heart so that I can obey what God commands, live by His directions and counsel, and carry through with building what God has given me to build."

 

 

Soaking, for me, is taking a few hours removed from distractions, perhaps in nature somewhere, to read the Bible, to meditate on phrases that resonate with my experience, to process by journaling, to worship, to pray. Sometimes it helps to fast (Is. 58:6 indicates that one purpose of fasting is to “break every yoke”.) Sometimes I come away with the next step of wisdom and strategic planning I need—but  I always come away with a soaked, liberated heart, much less stuck to the demands of the job or of the people in my life… like that postage stamp to the envelope…and more ready to be placed with others in a way that brings pleasure to God.

 

Miriam Phillips

Amsterdam, The Netherlands

Collected Treasures From Leadership Blog (Miriam Phillips)

My friend Miriam is a developer of and mentor for leaders, Miriam is a relentless searcher after resources. Here you get some of the rewards of her labors. Thanks for sharing these with the LCI readers. Plus thanks for asking those questions about the presence (or lack) of women producing these things.  (bkr)

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My friend Johan passed on this free resource of 281 pages of worthy quotes from leadership blogs compiled by the people from Exponential Network and Passion for Planting. Check out the first quote to get an idea of the kind of thought-provoking perspectives represented in this collection.

Link for the Leadership Blog Quotes

“Even the most creative people are tempted to stop being innovative when their ideas become successful. They subconsciously create a rule that says, "This idea worked, so don't do it differently." They "rubber-stamp" instead of "re-create." I'll say this as clearly as I can: If you are executing the same creative ideas you did last year because they worked, you are already on the decline.”

Posted by: Ben Arment, Innovation

I intend to work my way through the whole collection…which includes quotes from 20 bloggers including Alan Hirsch (co-author of The Shaping of Things to Come, The Forgotten Ways, and ReJesus) and a bunch of churchplanters I’d like to get to know better.

I do, however, notice that there aren’t any women’s voices in the mix.  

When Al and Deb Hirsch were with us at Crossroads International Church, her input was as valuable to us as his.  Are women less likely to value their own thoughts enough to write them out?  Are blogs by women less likely to be posted in places where they would be discovered for such a compilation? 

Do we (both women and men) value the contributions of women less if they are less theoretical and more practical? 

Miriam Phillips

The Netherlands

Praying Through the Pews on the Road to Finishing Well (Jack Hayford)

Miriam Philipps writes about her encounter with a leader who has been around for a long time. I think you'll enjoy her moving tribute to a truly great leader.  Thanks Miriam.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

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Last week I was in the position to see behind the scenes of Jack Hayford  and a room full of people he has influenced. Pastor Jack, at the age of 75, had just flown in from China where he had preached for 10 hours per day.  A few of us knew that he was in continual pain due to a needed surgery that was scheduled for after his return to the States; we kept serving him Sprite and crackers for his queasy stomach. 

 

Now, I’m not easily impressed by people in positions of authority just because of their title. (My journey as aging ex-flowerchild quasi-postmodern European has left its stamp.) But as a Jesus-follower, I’m willing to honor, serve and cooperate with all servants of the King, whatever their position.

 

As a leadership developer intent on helping people "finish well," I was doing my practical acts of service for Pastor Jack and the people in his organization, feeling a bit like a spy.  Guess what? I’ve added a new hero to my list!  I only got to hear snippets of his sermons, but I witnessed almost all of his other interactions and informal sharing.  And this is what I conclude:

1. I’ve never seen anyone more fully engaged with each person and each audience – a lifetime of listening had honed his skill of being able to instantly tune in when he converses with each person—from the young man bringing him water to the denominational leader asking his advice.

2. Pastor Jack never rushed, no matter what the schedule.

3. He expressed genuine thankfulness for each act of kindness.

4. He empowered those around him at every opportunity by commending the unique added value of each to the wider audience.

5. He didn’t assume that his perspectives on the world would necessarily be shared by an international audience. (Humility in an American leader is experienced as particularly endearing.)

6. He shared his personal practices as a spiritual leader freely, but with a focus on blessing the hearer, not on impressing.

7. These attributes were characteristic of all of the leaders high in his organization, numbers of whom were present.

My favourite story from Pastor Jack was told to an audience of about 30 leaders from about a dozen different countries.  He told us that, from the time when he was young and just beginning in ministry, it was his custom to enter the sanctuary of the church he pastored and to walk through the aisles, praying over each empty seat, for the person who would occupy it during the Sunday service.

Now, he says, he is still a pastor, but in his role as international leader, he still feels a pastoral responsibility, but for the world. Much as he prayed through the empty chairs each Saturday, he now prays almost every Saturday evening, wherever he is in the world, for each country by name (admitting that he sometimes has to peek at his list to make sure not to miss any).  So he could tell each one present that he had being praying for them every week in their place of ministry. A rare holy moment of intense spiritual connection.

 

Jack Hayford -- it was a great refreshment to see him finishing so well.  I pray for him (not just rhetorically) that the possible future challenge of releasing formal organizational control will be met with the same Spirit-filled graciousness we’ve glimpsed thus far.

 

Miriam Phillips

Amsterdam, Holland

Time Tested Wisdom

Miriam Phillips provides some practical insight on how teams can function in times of stress. 

 

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In my life, I've seen high potential teams engaged in meaningful missional ministry waste a great deal of their gifts, their time, their energy, and their material resources in not figuring out how to resolve differences.

 

Years ago, in a time of disagreement in a team, we were given advice that has served us well for many years. Everyone I’ve known for long has heard me quote this:

 

In a time of stress in a team:

 

1. Increase the quality and the frequency of the communication
2. Believe the best of each other's motives (a real challenge if emotions of hurt or disappointment are running high)

In talking with a colleague known for his good judgment, I heard him give this advice: 

 

1. Clarify who is responsible or making decisions in this situation
2. Have that decisionmaker or decisionmaking body ask the people most directly involved in a crisis about what they see as the one most essential problem
3. Solicit relevant ideas and win trust by asking each of these people what they would propose as a solution
4. Start any group conversation with with these 3 things on the table.
5. Bring clarity by not dealing with other issues at the same time.

I'm thinking that these tips to begin to bring clarity to complex situations will be ones I'll pass on for many years to come.

Miriam Phillips

The Price of Being Tuned In (Miriam Phillips)

As a coach and leadership trainer, Miriam shares practical suggestions from her experience on dealing with leaders who are sometimes described as - "feelers."

 

Thank you, Miriam, for passing on these relational insights about leadership.

 

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Michael has to say no to a colleague who really needs his expertise—so that he is able to focus on new developments in his own ministry.  Anna has to tell an applicant that someone else got the job.  Natasha is scheduled to tell a team member that the project will go on as planned in spite of his objections.

 

These are people I know and conversations I’ve been a part of in the last few weeks.  Because Michael is a “feeler”, he has the emotional intelligence to build bridges to this colleague in a way that continues the peer mentor aspect of their friendship.  Because Anna is a “feeler”, she is able to help the applicant feel genuinely supported in seeking another kind of position.  Because Natasha is a “feeler”, she is able to rely on the years of trust she has built up with this team member to keep inspiring his contribution, even when he disagrees about the approach.

 

 

Some people who are effective leaders are also people who are strongly emotionally affected by the impact of their leadership on the people around them. Although a feeler isn’t automatically emotionally intelligent, there seems to be a correlation to the potential for it.  But the responsibility of leading can cost a feeler a great deal, and the stronger the level of feeling, the more it seems to cost.  As a feeling leader initiates change, there is grief to processing the losses entailed as that change become evident.  As what is best for the good of the whole is acted on, he needs to deal with the stress of caring about potential painful effects on the lives of individuals without hindering moving toward shared goals.

 

Sowing Seeds of Learning (Miriam Phillips)

It was great to see Miriam for five days when she was in Lancaster taking the Emerging Paradigms Course. I really appreciate Miriam's delightful reflection that follows. I know you will as well.

Brian Rice

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It’s amazing what your grown children do or don’t remember of their upbringing. Memory is apparently not only selective, but revisionist. Why do they remember the heater grate in the living room floor, but nothing of a family celebration we spent days putting together.

 

But I’ve noted that even though they don’t remember the weeping willow we used to visit beside the stream—they’ve grown up loving trees.

 

For myself, I’ve read much through the years I don’t remember—but it continues to ‘feed my intuition’.  There are problems and issues I’ve wrestled with that have no apparent bearing on my current life, but the inner ‘muscles’ built in the wrestling still serve me well. 

 

And there are things that I can only really make my own a little bit at a time, building learning in thin layers, often repeated.  And there is some learning—like learning to let go—that needs to be embraced again in each new season, wresting my grasp from yet another too-tightly held treasure.

 

So I bury the seeds…in myself…in those God has given…and supplement the rains…as curious as anyone what will flower forth and what the intended fruit will be. 

 

I’m fully dedicated to seeds because I’m hooked on the harvest. 

 

Miriam Phillips

Leather Bound

Here is a thoughtful post from Miriam Phillips who is writing from Amsterdam.

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A leather-bound notebook:

If I were rich, I would buy each of the people I coach or mentor a leather-bound notebook to house their usually random collection of things they have discovered about themselves.  The leather would make it easy to find and likely to be taken seriously.  The contents would include . . .

 

and if you want to read the rest of what Miriam has to say, just click on the pdf . . .

 

Download leather_bound.pdf

Miriam Phillips

The Leadership Journey (Sometimes like Walking a Labyrinth): Miriam Phillips

Sometime back I asked my friend Miriam Phillips, to do some posting on the LCI blogsite. Miriam and her husband Bob have been working in The Netherlands for many years. Bob is an artist and involved in evangelism and pastoral ministry. Miriam is involved in leadership development and mentors a wide variety of leaders, both emerging and established. I have been privileged to be a part of Miriam's circle of friends and colleagues for a number of years. This is Miriam's first post. You'll enjoy her authenticity as she talks about her journey. Thanks Miriam for your willingness to share your leadership journey. I look forward to your ongoing leadership thoughts. (Brian)

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Most of us find it a struggle to maintain motivation and focus if we feel like we stand alone in what God has given us to do.  It takes a certain amount of toughness to plough through whatever circumstances we find to be adverse. (HBR article “How the Best of the Best Get Better and Better” from June 1, 2008 names ‘mental toughness’ as being a characteristic of sports and business high-performers.)

Each of us are affected differently by the loss of various elements in our ministry environment.  Which ones we will miss is shaped by our varied personalities and giftings.  (For example, extroverts struggle if there is no one to process with, introverts struggle if there isn’t time and space to work individually. More concrete people struggle with lack of clearly outside steps forward; visionary types are confronted when put in a situation without a future perspective; leaders find it confining to only have opportunity to carry out tasks without being able to influence anyone.) For me, as one who often encourages others, the lack of encouragement is a potentially huge de-motivating factor. Figuring out what to do when there is a lack, is a serious issue. 

As is the case with many women leaders, my own journey as a leader and as a leadership developer can be described as a labyrinth.  Note this HBR article attached to Brian’s May 11,2008 blog:  http://lci.typepad.com/leaders_resourcing_leader/files/women_in_the_labyrinth_of_leadership.pdf

Many turns, no overview hinting at what to expect next, stimulus for meaningful reflection if the anxiety of the process doesn’t entirely overwhelm.  I have had incredible mentors and empowering sponsors along the way, to whom I am greatly indebted.  But in that journey, I’ve had to deal with a larger-than-average number of discouraging comments and blank stares when people hear that I am involved in training leaders.  This is hard for me. 

Lately someone prayed for me that I would be able to stand firmly in the place God has given me and that I would be able to solely pay attention to what God is saying (Max Lucado's "playing for an audience of One' idea), whatever other voices that I hear. As God works this out in my life, I am finding a great resilience when faced with lack of support (like when a trusted pastor friend questions my involvement in a master's degree). Not only this, but only letting what God says reach my heart is also helping me to resist the urge to gloat when my contribution in someone's life is especially valued (like when a persepctive given to a developing young leader at a party turns out to be significant).

When I am able to avoid this emotional/spiritual rollercoaster of alternating pride and self-doubt, my energies are freed up to focus on my work, I am less distracted from ongoing communion with Jesus as I carry out my tasks, and I can serve others without the drain of waiting for their approval to feel worthwhile as a person.  Of course, it is God’s initiative and His power that makes this possible. Cooperating with God in this is helping.

Miriam Phillips