LeadershipConneXtions

Make Some New Contacts

At the most basic level - make one new contact per week... and this is really minimal.

Find new people to hang out with... to be inspired by... who will motivate you to go further and be better, through the example of their own life.

Find challenging people... who think differently than you do... who walk to a different tune than you do... who come from very different backgrounds than you do.

Find people who are doing what you are doing... partner with them... collaborate... network... have iron sharpening iron conversations.

You may be saying - how do I find them?
You may be saying - I don't have time to make new associations.
You may be thinking - that's not my personality.
You may be protesting - that sounds like a lot of work.

If you don't have the time---make it, find it, go digging for it, eliminate and re-prioritize to find the necessary hours.

Personality! Let's not go there on the extravert and introvert pattern. If you are leading and if you want to get better and if you want to be more connected -- than you must build your personal network of colleagues, partners, and friends -- no matter your personality.

Protest away... but it is hard work. All good things require some hard work. If they were easy, everyone would be doing it... but they are not.

Brian K. Rice  
Leadership ConneXtions International  
www.lci.typepad.com

The Difficulty of Leading Change

I like change.
At least I tell myself I like change.
I fancy myself an agent of change, a leader of change, a visionary of change.

Of course, when I am the one who is confronted with the need to change, and I am not the one who initiated this... and if I am rather settled in and comfortable - well that is another matter.

Leaders (at least some of them) are wired for change. The more apostolic or entrepreneurial the leader is (and these are the good reasons) or the more ADHD, restless and discontent the leader is (these are the bad reasons) - the more they will flirt with the change processes.

Leaders, those of us who like change, need to keep one simple thought in mind. Most people don't like it! And just because we do like it, does not mean they will like it. Or just because we are promoting it, does not mean they will buy in.

Change is challenging and difficult... scary and stressful... inconvenient and comfort-zone interrupting... In short - change is painful. No wonder most people resist it.  And remember - even change agents resist change when they are not the ones leading it.

Look at the cartoon. It is Herding Cats. It is sometimes used in reference to how hard it is to lead people through change processes. And it implies that the problem is the uncooperative response from people who make life difficult for the "noble leader." Personally - I think this cartoon is insulting. 

Still, change is necessary and is a fact of life. Leaders have to lead change processes. We just need to remember where our audience/constituents are at on this. Patience, a lot of prayer, warm conversations with those who are being affected by the change, love and empathy . . . be ready to have a lot of this when you lead the change process.

If there have been some leadership mistakes I have made in the past that have caused a fair amount of pain for others and for myself - it has been on this issue.

Brian K. Rice  
Leadership ConneXtions International  
www.lci.typepad.com

Finding Talent (One of Our Very Scare Resources)

I have had a number of situations over the last year that remind me of how hard it is to find "talent" and almost impossible to find "really good talent." 

LWCC has had some job searches that remain open because we can't find really good talent. Finding Talent is going to be crucial for the future of those ministries.

I talked with a friend who is looking in vain for some really talented individuals who want to work in some very challenging circumstances. Finding Talent is crucial for my friend.

I have recently read two different things that reminded me of this issue.

One was about the Jesuits in the days of Ignatius. The opportunities and needs facing the Jesuits were almost staggering... and they were seriously understaffed. 

Standing firm against the pressure to relax and lower the standards for new recruits, Ignatius kept the standards high in his search for talent. In fact, as he was dying, one of his regrets was that he did not MAKE THE STANDARDS EVEN HIGHER AND TOUGHER to be a Jesuit!

Wow!!!
 

And then I recently read an article about Wendy Kopp, the extraordinary female leader who started the Teach for America organization.

This is the home page for Teaching for America, check it out.

And check out this Wiki article while you are at it.

Wendy Kopp says her hardest challenge is Finding Talent. For her, talent is the key element because "it solves all the other problems." Wendy looks for the cream of the crop of college grads who will spend two years working in the inner city school system. She says NO to many more applicants than they accept.

Finding Talent.
Talent will solve all your other problems.
Not having talent will create a host of new ones for you.

And in the language of Jim Collins, the wrong hire is much worse than no hire.

So, don't settle for less than you need. Find Talent and do whatever you can to keep it.

Brian Rice
Leadership ConneXtions International
www.lci.typepad.com

p.s.  If some of my other reading is correct (and I am thinking of some words from Seth Godin) we really have to ramp up our interview processes... for they are woefully deficient in helping us find talent.

What Really Talented People Want (or) What Really Motivates Them to Produce Results

I think you will find the stats below to be of interest to you. If you are a senior leader, or if you are top talent working for another leader - check them out.

Contrary to popular, conventional, (and often wrong) wisdom, the most talented people ARE NOT attracted to a senior leader or to an organization because of its vision.

This is so counter-intuitive to leaders. (Personal Rant and Rave:  There is just so much really bad teaching on vision around these days..... ughh. End of Rant and Rave)

McKinsey and Company are just one management consultant group who researched to find out what really talented people are looking for in their senior leaders and organizations. Here is what they found.

The following factors are ranked as to how essential they were to keeping talented people motivated.

Values and culture in the company.   58%

Freedom and autonomy to do the job.  56%  

The job has exciting challenges.  51%

They are well managed.  %50  (Note: For a good explanation of what it means to be "well managed" be sure to read, First Break All the Rules and find out why much of the conventional wisdom, there it is again, is just wrong.)  Being well managed has the sense of highly intentional developmental work being done with top talent.

High Total Compensation.  23%  (I bet this one is a shocker for some of you. Most of the really talented people are only minimally motivated by compensation packages. You know, this might sound weird to you, but I don't even know how much I make and I never give it a second thought during the year. I appreciate the raise when I get it, but then compensation goes on the back burner as a motivating factor.)

An Inspiring Mission.  16% !!!!!   

Now that has to be sad for all those high powered visionary leaders. The facts are simple and documented. Inspiring Mission and Vision IS NOT a meaningful motivating factor for your top talent. So, if you are in senior leadership, the vision pep talk is not going to rally and motivate the troops.  

(Hint: One reason why is that truly talented people are not nearly as attracted to another person's vision, as they are to a place where they can work out their own vision. So the trick for senior leadership is to find ways to make the two visions dovetail... but that is another post.)

(Another lead:  This is even more true for younger, emerging leaders. To really explore this, you must read the simply essential, Leadership  Divided by Ron Carucci.)

What does? Take a look at the stuff mentioned at the top of the list. And if you want more insights, again, read, First Break All the Rules.

Brian "not always so counter-intuitive but often confused" Rice
Leadership ConneXtions International
www.lci.typepad.com

Lead With Stability

One of the core human needs is for stability and security. 

One of the core dynamics of leadership is change.

Those two things are not like chocolate and peanut butter (which go very well together), or chocolate and mint, or chocolate and ice-cream, or chocolate . . . opps, I got distracted due to my diet.

Stability and change are opposite ends of the spectrum. Change means stability is going, going, gone. Change means the old is up for grabs (say bye-bye security and who knows what brave new world will emerge. Change means we live with heightened uncertainty and "not knowing" is a painful place to be.

Leaders who are especially Agents of Change are constantly messing with stability... and that means rough waters are ahead.

When I was a senior pastor, I don't think I was as clued in to this issue as I should have been. I was a visionary leader, committed to radical organizational change, ready to implement a sweeping spectrum of new ideas into what I thought was a dated church. Oh, did I tell you that I just assumed that everyone saw things like I did!

I was messing around with core human needs and longings and being rather insensitive to it as well.
 

Just because people want stability and security and that they avoid uncertainty and instability (which change always brings) does not mean that we stop being visionaries and agents of change. It just means that we are a lot more sensitive and compassionate (see yesterday's post) as we lead the change process.

Gallup says that transparency is crucial for this process.
Put the cards on the table.
Give as much information as you can.
Do not hide or "spin" on the "brutal facts." (They always come out anyway.)

 Here are a few more practical suggestions.

1. Be an outstanding listener to those who are disappointed with the changes you are leading.
2. Acknowledge how hard the change is.
3. Seek to shore up stability wherever you can.
4. Be very smart and savvy with the change process. It is like an art, knowing how much change can be tolerated.
5. Work hard to get the early adopters on board and then the early majority as well.
6. Pray a lot... I mean a lot.

Do not minimize the stress people will feel as their stability disappears. Leaders who are true innovators just don't understand the "late majority" and how they will react when their stable foundations and secure ways are disappearing before their eyes.

So, pay attention to the confidence levels those around you have. In our current economic and social economy, there is a lot of instability. This is not a time for timidity, but nor is it a time for rashness. 

Brian "I could use a chocolate chip cookie" Rice
Leadership ConneXtions International
www.lci.typepad.com

Lead With Compassion

I talked about this issue in another recent post, The Leadership Way of Love. Still, it is well worth mentioning again because this one is pretty "counter-intuitive."

Instead of the word love, the Gallup people use the term compassion, and that is a good word.

Compassion is the deep awareness of the misfortunes and needs of others and the will to do something about their suffering or neediness.

We are now, deep in the realm of emotional intelligence and resonant leadership.  You have heard the old saying, but it bears repeating:

People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.

This one is especially true for those leaders who are more task oriented than people oriented. This is an area that I must pay attention to, for I am a task oriented leader. And on the MBTI, I fall just slightly over the mid line in extroversion. There are times when I am stressed or tired, that I fall into a significant introversion mode and am not sensitive to the needs of others.

When people feel they are cared for, they feel secure.
When people feel cared for, they are happier.
When people feel a leader is truly interested in their well-being, they are more engaged in their work.
When people feel connected to a caring leader, their commitment level increases substantially.

The leaders we remember the most, in terms of their positive impact on us, are those who have cared for us. This is part of the reason for why mentors are so important and so transformative in their impact on us. Good mentors, by definition, care for those they mentor. Good mentors show they care by the depth of personal investment they make in the mentoree.

One note that the Gallup people made is that in large organizations, while it is not possible for a senior leader to personally care for even most of the individuals, still, the bearing and demeanor of the leader and the acts of the leader, either exude caring or uncaring.

So, just like yesterday's encouragement - do some personal inventory on how you are doing on this dimension of Leading With Compassion.

If you would like to read a very nice eulogy for Ted Engstrom, whose last book before he died was Compassionate Leadership, read this post by Dan Kimball.

Brian Rice
Leadership ConneXtions International
www.lci.typepad.com

p.s.  I have not read this book, so I don't know how good it is. I do know that Ted Engstrom was a Level 5 leader, full of resonant energy and compassion for the world.

Lead With Trust

The Gallup research interviewed ten thousand followers and asked them a very specific question.

Please list three words that best describe what this person (i.e. a leader who had the most positive influence in their daily life) contributes to your life?

A good question!
Very intentional and highly strategic in its search to find out the nature of positive influence.

Four items emerged: 

Trust
Compassions
Stability
Hope

Today I'll have a few thoughts about TRUST and in the next three days look at the other qualities.
 

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We've known for some time how important trust is for the leader-follower relationship.  To say it simply, followers will not follow for very long, a leader they do not deeply trust. 

I know a leader who lost the trust of many of his followers due to incompetency. He just couldn't get the job done.

I know a leader who lost the trust of most of his followers due to character issues. He had lots of charisma, but not much character. Eventually, the charisma couldn't cover up the glaring character issues.

I know a leader who lost the trust of her team because of  her authoritarian way of leading. She led this way out of insecurity and the need to be in control. 

It very easy to lose trust and it is very hard to regain it, once it has been lost.

Leaders gain the trust of followers when we are consistently honest, when we act with constant integrity and we act in ways that are respectful of our role and of others...and when we show we have the ability to do the job and get the results that benefit everyone.

For all this, authenticity is the key. 
When people look at you, what they see is what they get.
Your personal behaviors are congruent with your public actions.
Words and deeds are in alignment.
You walk the talk, day after day, after day, after day . . .

If you act without integrity, if you are dishonest, if you are not respectful of others, then trust is lost. Depending on how big the "breach" it may be lost quickly, or just dribble away.

If you realize you are losing trust, then you MUST come clean on the very things that are causing suspicion and doubt. Forthcoming acknowledgement of your failures and inadequacies, and the appropriate addressing of those things (if you actually mean it) will help. But then you are going to have to "prove" you mean it by sustained change.

Listen - don't assume those who follow you trust you. If they are still with you, maybe they do or maybe they don't. Maybe they just don't have any other good option at the moment, so you are the lesser of evils. 

How would you like to have that as your eulogy. 

She/he was the lesser of evils.  

It will be worthwhile for you to do some inner processing about the issue of trust and then to have some good conversations with people about this issue.

In those conversations, approach it like this:  What can I do that would "enhance" your ability to trust me? The question, asked like this, doesn't force the other person to say whether they do or don't trust you. It does give them the chance to give a meaningful answer about what is important to them in the area of trust, without criticizing your lack of it.

Brian "hey you can trust me" Rice
Leadership ConneXtions International
 www.lci.typepad.com

A Company of Friends

One of the reasons I have been intrigued by the Jesuits is their very name.

In the Spanish, they were the Compania de Jesus  (sorry I can't do the punctuation properly). But it translates, The Company of Jesus.

In the formal Latin documents, the name was translated as Societas Iesu or The Society of Jesus.

That was often shortened to Jesuits, or sometimes, "The Society."

But above all, they were companions of Jesus and friends with one another. They had the spirit of companionship and friendship embedded in their society.

They were companions who did life long learning together.

They were friends who were bound together with missional purpose.

They were colleagues who had a strong sense of love, trust and respect for one another.

Sometime ago, I read a book, whose title summed this up.

The Pursuit of God in the Company of Friends.

In a real sense, that is what Leadership ConneXtions aspires to. I want to be a part of a company of friends who pursue God and who serve His missional purposes in the world. One problem is that some of these friends are close at hand and it is easier to do life together. But others live elsewhere around the world and it is harder to do life together. Harder, but not impossible.

There is a beautiful quote that we hear spoken by Frodo, as the Lord of the Rings is nearing its end. I don't have it exactly, but this is close. Even though the Fellowship of the Ring had accomplished its purpose and the individuals had to go their own ways, "they were forever bound by the deepest bonds of friendship and love."

That is what I long for.
That is what I work for with Leadership ConneXtions. A group of colleagues and friends, joined together in the pursuit of leadership, spirituality and mission, bonded with affection and love.

Thank-you to those who feel the same.

Brian Rice
Leadership ConneXtions International
www.lci.typepad.com

The Right People in the Right Seats

When I first read this idea of Jim Collins, I had one of those "duh!" experiences.  Do you know what I mean by a "duh!" experience? It is when you hear something that makes so much sense, that your immediate reaction is - "duh!," of course! In fact, your "duh" reactions goes even further. You think, I already knew this, but now it really makes sense!

You knew it at an intuitive level, at a just below the radar of your conscious awareness, or as a early forming idea.  And the "duh!" experience is someone giving you the language and the framework to clarify what you have been feeling and sensing.

That is what The Right People in the Right Seats idea was for me when I first heard it. I would say it is part of Collins' gift to the world of leadership that he creates "duh!" moments over and over. I would also admit that he also creates "huh?" moments as well, but that is another post.

But, back to the Right People in the Right Seats issue. I was doing a lot of work on the Focused Life material this past week and I revisited and reread Collins (and Drucker and Buckingham) for some help thinking through the issues of Platform and Role, as well as the nature of Boundary experiences for leaders.

Here is a summary of their and my thinking about The Right People in the Right Seat issue.

Quitting . . . Bosses

We've known for a long time that one of the main reasons people quit a job is because of the boss or  perhaps a co-worker. Employees don't just leave companies and organizations, they leave supervisors. One survey showed some of the reasons people left jobs (multiple choices were allowed which is why the percentages don't add up to 100%).

30% of people left their job to seek new challenges or opportunities that were lacking with their previous job.

25% of people left because of what they called "ineffective leadership."

22% of people cited poor relationships with their manager.

21% said their contributions were not valued by management.

You can call it  Dark Side Leadership.

You can call it dissonant leadership.

You can call it authoritarian leadership.

The tag doesn't matter, but results do. 

Good people, smart people healthy people, productive people . . . usually won't endure for long, dysfunctional leadership.

When was the last time you left a job?  Why did you leave?  And perhaps more important - who did you leave?

Check Out Bad Bosses.com

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Relationships Matter

There is very little else on earth that matters more than the relationships we have with one another.

So today is a good day to be highly relational, highly present for others, a superb listener, pay attention and observe and notice.

Serve, encourage, empower, love.

Take this with you all day long.

If you have a few minutes and have a Bible handy, read Romans 12:9-21.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

My Fault

My Fault. Two words a leader needs to have readily accessible, able to be used at a moment's notice.

My Fault.  Two words that create openness, restore confidence, mend fences, and build bridges.

My Fault. Two words that reveal integrity, authenticity, vulnerability, humanness, and trust.

My Fault. Two words that demonstrate ownership and responsibility.

My Fault. Two words that are more uncommon than they should be.

My Fault. Two words that require honesty and humility (which is perhaps why they are rather uncommon).

My Fault. Two words that need to be resurrected out of the dusty tombs in which they lay.

My Fault. Two words that your tongue may need retrained to pronounce without distortion.

My Fault. Two words that are like music to the ears of the one who needs to hear you say them.

My Fault. When was the last time you said that to someone?

My Fault. Contrary to popular opinion . . . it is yours and it is your responsibility.

My Fault. Go ahead. Say it right now. Practice saying it out loud so your ears can hear that unfamiliar language.

My Fault. Who do you need to say it to today?

My Fault. Will you go and say it now?

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

The Leader as "Orchestra Conductor"

I never metaphor I didn't like.

Well, I ripped that right off the title of a book I am reading by that title. And it is true for me as well. I love metaphors. I think it is really useful to find creative new images or words that become the doorway to new understandings of established ideas.

When it comes to leadership, I think many of our metaphors are old and tired. Some of them are so worn out they aren't useful any longer. And others are dangerously deceptive guides (Tim Keel, not Tim Keller!). I am always on the lookout for new metaphors.

Here is one that may be useful.

The Leader as "Orchestra Conductor." I have "played around" with this one before, but reading Future in-Formation by Carucci and Epperson brought it to the front burner since they used it in their framework. I spent two hours thinking this one through that morning. At the end I am going to tie these thoughts in with yesterday's post on Affirmation, Recognition.

And let's think of contrasting this with the leader as a one man band. My age is going to come out with this illustration, but I saw the Mary Poppins movie at the Stoney-Brook Drive-in Theater when it first came out in 1964! I've seen it many times since then and one of my favorite images is Dick Van Dyke being the one man band.  Take a minute and watch the clip.
 

Okay, it is funny and he does a decent job entertaining the crowd, but think for a moment about leaders. Too many leaders are the "One Man Band" or "One Woman Band"  show. They are doing everything. All the attention is on them. It is ALL up to them. They may be a one man band out of necessity... out of preference... or out of ignorance... but they are the show. They are the ONE getting all the recognition.

Now, think about the leader as orchestra director. I can't even think about this theme without reminiscing about one of my favorite all time movies - Mr Holland's Opus. In fact, if you are like me and learn from films, go out and rent the DVD and watch it again, observing the work of the director or conductor.

ONE:  The orchestra conductor (after this OC) has the ability to recognize and appreciate the wonderful diversity of instruments and sounds they make. Plus, they can understand the work needed on the part of the musicians to play those instruments well.

TWO:  The OC knows that musicians are specialists. To be wonderful and accomplished in an instrument does not mean you are the same in other instruments and certainly not in every instrument. The OC appreciates the giftedness of each musician. And think about this - the OC knows that the individual musicans are far superior to the OC in making music on their instrument.

The only time there are exceptions to this are in the cases of conductors/musicians. This is analogous to the player/coach situation you occasionally (but not often) find in sports. In the world of music, think of Andrei Rieu. (If you have never heard of him, then you probabaly don't watch Public TV.) Andrei is an accomplished violinist who conducts his orchestra as well.

On Our Need to be Recognized, Valued, Affirmed

I am working my way through Future in-Formation by Carucci and Epperson. I had an advance copy of it earlier in 2008 which I read quickly. Now I am working through it, engaging with the exercises. And one of the early exercises launched this reflection for me.  Here is their website.

It is about a longing we have. Call it a need if you like.

We all need to be affirmed by others. We need to be recognized. We need to know we are valued by others. And even the people who protest loudly that they don't want to be recognized, that they have a robust self-image that doesn't need outside affirmation, have this need. It is inescapable. it is hardwired into our humanity and downloaded into our DNA.

Many long years ago, I was introduced to the idea of man/women created in the image of God by psychologist, Larry Crabb. Crabb pulled together some loose threads that I had and I came away with a much clearer, more integrated understanding of what it means to be a human being. AND, that all the aspects of our humanity shape our needs and desires.

A few years ago I began to read the books of  Ronald Rolheiser(who I think is one of the most insightful writers on spirituality around). Rolheiser spoke of immortal longings and these longings have to do with our being made in the image of God and created with desires, needs and longings that are to be fulfilled.

One of the core longings is the need for affirmation. It is directly tied to another longing that we have and that is the longing for meaningful work and purposeful activity that produces something that is good, beautiful and true. Since we are made in the image of the Worker/Creator God, we are designed to be workers/creators as well. (Reread Genesis 1 and 2 and look for this.)

In other words:  We long to work. We long for meaningful work. We long for meaningful work that produces something worthy. And we long for affirmation that we have done so.

And follow this . . . we rightly find both fulfillment and self-worth in this as our longing is fulfilled. If it is not fulfilled, then we experience unfulfillment and question our worth. And rightly so! This is just good creational theology and good spirituality. 

Now, let me take this one step further. This post is almost done and our final thoughts will set the stage for tomorrow's post on how we lead in light of this.

How do I know if I am making a significant contribution that is valued? How do I know if my work is full of meaning and purpose? It is possible that your inner assessment and self-congratulations are sufficient. It's possible, but not likely.

It's not likely because our self-awareness / self-assessment is always limited and faulty and therefore, your autonomous answers are generally inadequate and distorted.

And it's not likely because we are also relational beings (part of the image of God) and made for community. We are fully human, fully alive, fully significant, fully worthwhile in the context of community, relating with one another. I need for others to recognize and affirm my worth, my significance and my contribution. This is not weakness.  This is (again) good creational theology and spirituality.

(By the way, I loved this cartoon on Cartoon Stock. Check out their site for great stuff.) It mattes a great deal what others think about us.

I am significant as a worker for, with and to others.

My life purpose is intertwined with the welfare of others.

And thus, I need appropriate feedback from those "others." Not untrue flattery, but first truth spoken in love that is corrective and  then affirmation/encouragement/value spoken freely and authentically.

Oh do we need this and oh is it ever in short supply.  And oh do we hurt at its lack.

Thus . . . enter the work of leadership and that is tomorrow's post using a great metaphor to create new ways of understanding how we do this.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Become a Raving Fan

FACEBOOK has a fun feature. You can become a "fan" of someone or something. Become a fan of a person, a place, a thing, a cause, an event, an idea . . . you name it and you can become a fan of it.

Of course the best fans are RAVING FANS. Not Raven Fans, although this year Raven Fans are becoming Raving Fans. (Like the guy to the right who touches the toe of Johnny Unitas in Unitas Plaza, before every game.) Detroit Lions fans are becoming extinct. Raving Fans of the Yankees are just deluded Fanatics who should be penalized for spending obscene amounts of money to buy a world series championship. But I digress . . .

Raving Fans love whatever it is they are a fan of. Think very high levels of energy, enthusiasm, commitment, faith, perseverance and then spreading the good news about whatever it is you are a fan of.

Casual fans don't do this. Lukewarm fans don't do this. Fair-weather fans don't do this. Bi-polar fans don't do this.  But Raving Fans . . .

The really good leaders are Raving Fans of certain core things and they relentlessly promote those things. The truly great leaders are those who are able to turn Lukewarm Fans into more Raving Fans.

Do this and you have a movement. Fail to do it and maybe you have a club.

And this point is tricky . . . you can only be a Raving  Fan about a few things. It is not possible to be a Raving Fan Flavor of the Month kind of leader.

What are you a Raving Fan about? Why are you a Raving Fan? And the litmus test - how quickly do others identify you as a Raving Fan?

Take a minute and write down the TOP THREE THINGS of which you are a Raving Fan.

Let me go one step further and ask: Is anyone a Raving Fan about you and what you are doing?

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Listening

"Listening is the time I must wait until I start speaking again."

Well, that cynical, but honest definition of listening, is probably a lot more common than it should be!

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Here is a quick exercise for you to do. I hope it isn't too painful.

Make a column and label it Great Listeners and write under it the names of your closest family, friends and co-workers who are really good listeners.

Make another column and label it Poor Listeners and do the same thing for those who are really poor listeners.

Which column is longer for you?

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When a basketball team is struggling for wins, the good coach does not look for a new, complex plays to incorporate into the game plan. When a basketball team is struggling - it means - BACK TO THE BASICS.

Back to getting a sharper, tighter passing game.

Back to eliminating turnovers.

Back to hitting the boards for the rebounds.

Back to making free throws.

(Yes, it also helps if your team can go out and spend a truckload of money to buy the best talent who already knows the basics and executes them very well.)  Anyway . . .

BACK TO THE BASICS.

If a relationship is struggling, if a team is misfiring, if an organization is stagnant, and if your God connection is disappointing - then, BACK TO THE BASICS.

And I think listening is one of those basics that we really need to focus on.  James 1:19 is one of those verses that was etched into my memory (but not always into my practice) many years ago. In part, it reads:

Everyone (not just a few, no one is exempt, especially not leaders) should be quick (not hesitant, not feet-dragging, nor sluggish) to listen (attentively and intensely) and slow to speak(pontificate, pronounce, argue, debate, spew, correcting, fixing, yada-yada-yada)

Okay, that was my version of the Amplified Bible approach to a biblical text.  (Biblical text in blue.)

Listening is:

Really paying attention to the other...

so that you know and understand what they are saying...

Then, not responding immediately with a rebuttal or counter-point...

but asking questions that give them more time to explain what they mean...

Then moving into a dialog about what they have said to make sure you have understood what they are saying.

That's listening.

Then, you are ready to speak, share your thoughts!

It takes time, it takes patience, it takes self-vigilance.

Maybe that is why there is such a dearth of true listening.

Maybe listening is one of the BASICS, it's time to get back to.

**********************************

Here is another exercise.

Make a short list of 3-5 people.

Who do you most need to really work at listening to in the coming week?

Give them the gift of your best listening.

**********************************

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Conflict: A Few Practical Helps

Conflict is normal. It is to be expected. When it happens, it doesn't mean you or the team are doing something wrong. It is how we handle conflict in the moment and what we do with conflict after the fact, that makes conflict either productive or harmful.

Conflict is normal because people are different. We do not perfectly agree on anything. We have different values... beliefs... opinions... preferences... visions... experiences... desires... personalities...

And when these differences interact (sometimes they collide) in conversations about things that matter a great deal to us, then there is conflict.

Here are a few pratical thoughts on working "with" conflict so that it becomes a tool that advances the team or group and not a trainwreck that derails forward movement.

ONE:  Allow conflict to occur. Give people permission to disagree. If you don't give permission for and allow conflict, then the real beliefs will go unacknowledged and you will only have a facade of buy-in. You get acquiescence and not commitment. To get commitment, you must often go through the conflict process to arrive at a mutually valued understanding and agreement.

TWO:  Criticism and Conflict should be about issues and stances. Never attack people.  This is where conflict heads south at warp speed. We can easily get sidetracked into attacking one another. Vigilant leadership is needed to keep group conflict focused on the issue and not people. It is very helpful for groups to have clarity on this dynamic so the team recognizes "fouls" (Hybels) and someone is willing to call foul.

THREE:  Try a "best ideas for" and "strongest arguments against" as group exercises. If there is some polarization on issues and battle lines are being drawn, you are not working as a team. Ask everyone to take the pro side and come up with the best ideas for a position. Then have the entire team take the con side and think through the strongest arguments against an issue.

FOUR:  Have someone who will call "foul." When infractions incur during conflict (and they will), instead of ignoring them, someone needs to step up and call the foul and say something like, "That's not how we agreed to work through issues where there is conflict." "Let's refocus and re-engage the issue in the way we agreed to." If an apology is needed on the spot, the team should expect that. Give it, receive it and move on.

FIVE: Make amends if that is needed and do so promptly. Few things are as bad as ill will that is simmering. Bruised egos that are being quietly nursed turn into resentment. Stomped on toes lead to grudges and undermining behaviors. I wish we were all (and myself included) mature enough to say it doesn't happen to me or in my team, but it does.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Give Grace Not Grief

Teams and communities are built on TRUST.

They are places were we feel SAFE with each other.

These are the relational connections where we practice AGAPE with one another.

We all (at least I hope we all) know that trust, safety and agape are vital for healthy communities, teams and organizations. But we don't always know, practically, how to create this ethos. Well, here is one helpful principle.

Give people GRACE, not GRIEF.

To give grace means you give forgiveness, acceptance, unconditionality, shalom ... You give them the benefit of the doubt. You give them a "Mulligan." All you golfers know what this one means. If you don't golf and you don't know what it means, go find a friend who does and ask them.

To give grief means you power up, you scold, you rebuke, you get on their case, you get in their face, you are agressive or even passive agressive. Maybe you give the cold shoulder, the silent treatment, you withdraw.  It takes lots of forms depending on the personality of the giver and the nature of the relationship.

If you are upset at someone, give them grace, not grief.

When you are disappointed with someone, give them grace, not grief.

When someone has let you down, give them grace, not grief.

When you are in an argument or time of conflict, grace not grief.

Too often, we leaders react negatively, we power up for control, we prematurely end conversations, we hurt people . . . because we give GRIEF and not GRACE.

When we give GRIEF we are:

• dismissive of their thoughts without hearing them,

• over-reactive with our preferred opinions and ways which come across as (my way or the highway, this is the way it is and the way it is going to be),

• shutting down exploration and dialogue,

• being critical without being considerate.

When we give GRACE we:

• listen,

• respect the other,

• seek to understand first and only then be understood (Covey),

• get in their shoes and not in their faces,

• affirm and appreciate,

• build morale.

This final statement is probably a future post.  But, I am convinced that it is only those who have a track record of receiving GRACE from us, who will be able to hear TRUTH from us.  Your position may give you the right to "speak truth" to someone. But it is your grace that will empower others to "hear truth" from you.

So - how are you doing on this GRACE - GRIEF dynamic?

Be alert to your interactions with others this week.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Monitor and Correct (We Are Skewed to the Negative)

Annette Simmons stopped me cold with this insight.

Most of us have to admit we are not that noticeable when we are happy and productive. We sort of fade into the woodwork.

Isn't that the truth!

It is human nature. Bad news attracts our interest. Bad news sells. Bad news is what we talk about. And for some people, to add insult to injury, not only is their human nature wired this way, but by personality or temperament, they are that way. Sort of the Eeyore type.

Simmons says the result of this is that we are mainly experienced as negative people. We monitor and see what is wrong, we jump in with our criticism of what is wrong, and now we solve the problem.We think we are being positive in this, but in fact, we are experienced as negative.

We criticize more than we affirm.

We complain more than we celebrate.

We diminish more than we uplift.

Pay attention over the next several days to your interactions and conversations with others. Try to be aware of what you are saying and how it is being received. Be alert to the presence of negative, critical conversation.

Remember, "encouraging the heart" is one of the top ten leadership skills. (Kouzes and Posner, The Leadership Challenge)

And creating "resonance" in the workplace (a spirit of positivity) is the primal leadership task. (Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence)

Brian  Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Your lack of planning . . .

"Your lack of planning does not constitute an emergency on my part."

I don't know who said it, but I love it!

Have you ever been sucked in to someone else's emergency that was due to their lack of planning and preparation. Something for which they were responsible was not done and an emergency/crisis arose because of it. The lack of timely action by them generated a serious problem. It is the issue of missed deadlines, delayed results, failed objectives.

Lack of planning on the part of one person creates emergencies for many. It puts us into situations where we must wing it, improvise, offer ill-thought responses, play catch up, offer up the desperate prayer for help, bust ourselves to deal with the emergency, drop everything else we are working on or sometimes, just clean up the mess!

I've been pulled into someone else's emergency that was due to lack of planning!  (And unfortunately, I have pulled people into my emergencies as well.)

Sometimes we play the role of the rescuer. We moan and complain about being pulled into the emergency, but actually, we like to rescue, to save the day, to be the good guy who comes through at the moment of crisis.

But when we do this, we become the co-dependent leader, the enabling leader (not empowering). So we must resist the tendency to be pulled into someone else's emergency (remember - this is the kind that is due to lack of planning). Instead, we must allow them to face the consequences of their lack of planning.

What if those consequences spill over and affect us? I know that is a problem and one that we use to justify care-taking, enabling behaviors. Obviously we have to be responsible and not let the team or organization suffer. But make sure you have some pretty honest assessment about the other person's lack of planning and empower them to become a pro-active planner and not an Emergency Creator.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Leaders Who Live on Different Planets (Jobs and Behar)

A few weeks ago I did some blogging about Steve Jobs and Apple and the tension I felt as I read about Jobs' leadership style. To say it bluntly, Jobs exemplifies most of what I think is wrong with leadership today. I won't list all those things again. Unfortunately (for me), by being the wrong kind of leader, Jobs gets extraordinary results and he has gained the world through the production of a truly superior computer product.

And soon after I finished that book, I read Howard Behar's book about Starbucks. And Behar represents just about everything that I think is right about leadership. And he also has a superior product and great success.

Two leaders.  Two leadership ways that are polar opposites. Both eminently successful. One I respect and the other I "almost" despise (that is the leadership ways, not the people).

I guess this is my question. Is there a place for Jobs' style of leadership, even if it is all wrong?

And: Does the end (a superior product that makes tons of money) justify the means (the leadership way of Jobs)?

Here is one more question:

What good will it be for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?(Matthew 16:26)

Brian Rice

Leaders Who Care (and the Followers Who Believe Them)

Caring, it is what life is all about. We talk about professional care, health care, home care aids, pastoral care and so on.

Here is a paraphrase of a well known quote: 

Followers don't care how much a leader knows until they really know how much the leader truly cares.

On June 10 I did a post on caring and empathy and while reading  Behar's book about Starbucks (see the sidebar- CURRENT READS) it really hit me again. Caring is vital to leadership.

Jim Collins talks about moving from good to great. Howard Behar wold say that "caring" is part of that move and part of the essence of great leadership.

When I read Behar, I think he either has had some significant Christian worldview imprinted on him at some point, or that he is just the blessed recipient of an unusual amount of common grace and natural revelation.

Behar talks about the leader caring for others proactively (do it first), unconditionally (whether it is returned or not) and sacrifically (take the heat and take the bullet aimed at others). Hey - that is a three point message right there. Although the best messages are lived for a season before they are spoken.

Caring for others in this way is at the heart of great people leadership and great organizational leadership. Behar thinks that MBA programs ought to offer Love and Caring 101 in their curriculum.

The point of this is to do some reflection and assessment:

• Do you really care for the people you lead?
• In what ways do your actions line up with your answer?
• Who don't you care for?
• And - if you asked those around you (and if they would give honest answers) would they name you as a caring leader?

It is important for leaders to remember that the definition of care changes somewhat (much like the Love Language idea) from person to person.  We have to be "careful" to understand what others really need in terms of care.

Maybe it is time to come up with your Personal, 2008 Gift of Caring Project.

Brian Rice

The Fundamental Task of Leaders . . . (a la Goleman and Blanchard)

When we teach the Leadership  Foundations Course at Living Word Community Church, Becky Rice is one of the presenters. One of her areas of specialty is emotional intelligence. One session she does is Emotional Intelligence and Self-Awareness.

Here is a quote she uses from Goleman that always gets a reaction and heated discussion from the participants:

The fundamental task of leaders, we argue, is to prime good feelings in those they lead. That occurs when a leader creates resonance - a reservoir of positivity that frees the best in people.  At its root then, the primal job of leadership is emotional . . .

Great leadership works through the emotions . . . No matter what leaders set out to do - whether it's creating strategy or mobilizing teams to action - their success depends on how they do it. Even if they get everything else just right, if leaders fail in this primal task of driving emotions in the right direction, nothing they do will work as well as it could or should . . .

When leaders drive emotions positively . . .they bring out everyone's best. We call this effect resonance. When they drive emotions negatively . . . leaders spawn dissonance.

Now, the obvious reflection question is this:  What kind of emotions are you projecting, imprinting, and leaking on to your team and on to your organization and on to your mentorees?

Many years ago Blanchard and Johnson, in The One Minute Manager told us that people do better work with they feel good about themselves. Leaders have a significant role to play in creating places of work and ministry where people can feel good about themselves, know they are valued and loved.

So - how are you doing with all this?

Hmmm - how am I doing with all this?

Brian Rice

Empathy and love for people (it's at the heart of servant leadership)

Here are some pretty amazing words.

Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches. Who is weak, and I do not feel weak? Who is led into sin, and I do not inwardly burn?  (2 Corinthians 11:28-29)

Now, I don't know what your initial impression is of the Apostle Paul. Maybe you see him as this brilliant theological genius... or perhaps as an intense, no-holds barred debater when it comes to matters of truth... or maybe a task driven, High-D, Type-A, "I love the world, it's people I don't like" kind of a guy.

But read 2 Corinthians (one of my favorite books in the Bible and a Core Book for my understanding of leadership) and the true picture of Paul emerges.

He deeply loves people.

He has high levels of empathy.

The pain and suffering and struggles of people are what keep him up at night.

Take a few minutes and look closely at the Rembrandt. I look at this and see 2 Corinthians 11:28-29. Deep concern for people is etched on his face and is calling forth a letter.

For leaders who are more task driven, we just need to keep on thinking about this pretty basic thing called - LOVE and empathy, the back half of the Great Commandment.

Brian Rice

The Four "Voices"

N.T. Wright in Simply Christian lists what he believes are four longings of the heart (he calls them VOICES).

    The longing for JUSTICE.

    The quest for SPIRITUALITY.

    The hunger for RELATIONSHIPS.

    The delight in BEAUTY.

I think the work of leadership is to help people connect with the deepest longings of their heart. We do this through our teaching, through our imprinting of our own fullness of life, and through the systems and structures we shape in our organizations.

It might be worthwhile for you to sit down and reflect on how well you are doing in leadership when it comes to these four longings.

Brian Rice