LeadershipConneXtions

The Bible, Our Culture, and the Work of Transformation (Tim Adour)

To say it mildly, when LCI teaches leadership in other cultures, we have fascinating and important conversations. When we help leaders wrestle with new paradigms of leadership that emerge out of the Scriptures, sometimes the lights go on and there are "aha moments." Other times there is major resistance. 

Tim shares how he engages with leaders as we teach new ideas of leadership that are quite different from "the way things are normally done around here."  As I was reading Tim's thoughts, it hit me again - we North Americans have the same resistance to these counter-cultural ideas of Scripture!  -bkr-

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Any student of the Bible would have to acknowledge that communicating the gospel within the context of a culture is vital.  To ignore the culture and how the Bible comes to and engages its host cultures, is to add hindrances to the acceptance of the truth.

  

This theme is seen in the differences of the Synoptic Gospels. Even thought Matthew-Mark-Luke seem very similar, they are quite different. 

Matthew wrote to the Jewish culture, Mark to the Roman and Luke to the Greek.  Had Luke used as many Old Testament references as Matthew they would have been lost on the Greek reader.  The Old Testament scriptures did not carry the same weight with the Greeks as the Jews.  What were Matthew, Mark and Luke doing?  They were considering the culture to which they wrote and approached the presentation of truth from that culture.  Obviously, truth never changes but the approach must.  

When I travel cross culturally, I sometimes find a resistance to certain leadership ideas I am teaching.  On two recent occasions, as we were talking about biblical leadership (which is really quite radical and often "counter-cultural,") the argument against these ideas was simply - “You don’t understand our culture.  What you’re saying won’t work.”  

As we processed these questions (and challenges) it became clear there was a lack of understanding of two things.

ONE:  Christ came not only to redeem individuals, but also culture. Just because an entire culture functions in a certain way, that doesn’t mean what it is doing is righteous.  

TWO:  As Christ changes individuals, so He can and wants to, change culture.

The pessimistic conclusion from not understanding these realities is that culture won't change, the Biblical truth doesn't apply (i.e. won't work here) and that we'll continue to do things in the church as they do in the cultural world around us!

Here are a few of the ideas we unpacked.

(1)    Changing an entire culture is far beyond any one individual, yet all followers of Christ are called to be agents of cultural transformation.

(2)    Culture develops over generations and to say it is deeply rooted and established is a vast understatement. It is the way things are, we are rooted in a culture and the culture is established in us.

(3)    Cultural transformation will be a slow, gradual process.

(4)    It is the work of leadership to lead cultural transformation. We who lead for Christ must be re-rooted in the culture of God's kingdom and Christ's Way. That Kingdom/Way is seeking to break into this present reality and change it (redeem it, heal it, purify it, transform it).

Having seen the failure to grasp these concepts, here is my observation:  It seems to me that we are resistant to the above ideas for three reasons.

Theologically:  We don't understand how the eternal word is incarnated in to culture. We have not had the eyes (or paradigms) to see the beauty of the cultural diversity in which the Gospel was revealed to us.

Missiologically:  We haven't understood the process of how the Scriptures encounter and change the cultures to which they come.

Personally:  We are fearful of change.  This rone eally hit me. Sometimes we hear the concept of cultural change and suddenly realize - this concept will require personal change.  In my opinion, this is the greatest factor in the resistance I’ve encountered.  

So, what does one do?  

For a start we must become Self-Aware. We must examine our speech, attitudes, actions, and any other aspect of leadership, which is more concerned about cultural norms rather than biblical truth.

  

We must decide which is more important to us, the way things have always been done in our culture, or the new biblical Way we are invited to walk.  This is being Highly Intentional.

We must then do the very hard work of understanding models and methodologies of biblical study and cultural transformation (being Wisely Strategic).

And since this will always come with a price, Deep Surrender to the will and work of God is contantly needed.

Tim Adour 
Church of the Revelation 
The Bronx, New York

Paraguay April 2010 Report (Tim Adour)

The little country of Paraguay is a place LCI loves to visit. We've done quit a bit of work there, usually doing graduate courses for REG/SATS. On a teaching trip last year, Tim Adour made good contacts there and he returned a few weeks ago, only this time going to a Training Center for pastors and missionaries. Here are a few comments from Tim about his trip.   -bkr-
 

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Having just returned home from a week in Paraguay, I would like to highlight a couple of things from the trip. 

 

I spent most of the week teaching young bible school students.  I have taught pastors, community and business leaders; however, investing in the leadership of the next generation brings a great deal of personal satisfaction.  If we can help them avoid some of the mistakes we made, how much more effective will they be?  

From there I went a border city of Paraguay and Argentina.  I taught that evening, but the most thrilling part of the day was a 15 secular radio station interview.  Through business contacts of one of the local pastors, I was interviewed by the morning show celebrity.  We discussed the difference between Transformational and Transactional Leadership.  

Soon after our discussion began this celebrity’s staff stopped working, came to the booth window and listen to the interview.  Immediately after we cut to a commercial the staff burst into the booth and started telling the host how he was a combination of both types of leader and how he needed to hear what I said.  It was funny and interesting at the same time. 

One of the lessons I had reinforced was to allow the Holy Spirit to have His way when I travel.  I taught almost nothing I had intended.  God has other ideas and as the week unfolded it was a blessing to see His hand at work.  
 

Tim Adour  
Church of the Revelation  
The Bronx, New York

Tim Adour Off to Paraguay to Teach at a Missionary Training Center

My good friend Tim Adour is heroic. 

He was willing to take off, right after a busy Easter weekend, to go to Paraguay to teach and train pastors, evangelists and missionaries at a training center located several hours outside of Asuncion.

Tim has a lot of travel ahead of him and several connections to make before he arrives at the training center. He will be down in the southeast corner of the country.Pray for his connections, for his health, for his teaching and for a real gifting from God to equip all those who are at the center.

 

 

Tim is going to be teaching the students who are at the center... he'll be doing a pastor's conference... and most likely some preaching at local churches as well.

When Tim goes on these trips, he basically tells the hosts - "work me hard, I am here to serve you." And they do and Tim does.

LCI has been privileged to be in Paraguay numerous times and we enjoy some longstanding relationships with leaders there.

Tim will give an update when he is back.

Please be in prayer for his time there.

Brian K. Rice  
 Leadership ConneXtions International  
www.lci.typepad.com

Because I Said So (Tim Adour)

Hey, read this post by my friend Tim Adour - because I said so!   -bkr-

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I have 2 grown kids.  One is married; the other is in graduate school.  The phrase “because I said so” is long gone from my quiver of parental expressions.    In fact, I’m sitting here with a smile on my face trying to imagine the response if I were to try to resurrect that term.  My son is 6’ 2” and has muscles I don’t.  My daughter is just like her old man.  She would respond the same way I would if someone said this to me.  Bottom line…I’d be wasting my breath.  

Why would my kids reject being spoken to that way?  Obviously, they’re adults, living their own lives, and have moved past the stage where I can dictate their actions.  I am sure I used that phrase far more than I should have with my kids, but am absolutely sure it is used inappropriately by leaders in organizations, and I think I know why.  

In my opinion, the leader’s insecurity is one of the reasons for a dictatorial attitude and expressions of dominance.  We are asked “why” and instead of answering the question we view the question as an affront to our authority and fire back some form of “because I said so.”  And here’s the really interesting part…we can’t figure out why we’re constantly dealing with resistance.  We will chide those who report to us for insubordination, but fail to look at the way we talk to them.  We will lament the lack of initiative by our followers, but don’t realize our words and tone subvert initiation.   

We could list plenty of psychological and scriptural principles that speak to treating our followers properly, but I’m kind of a no nonsense type of guy.  So, here is what I say to myself.  Hey stupid, you’re talking to adults.  Stop treating them like children because even children don’t like being told “because I said so.”  

We (well, at least I) can use the reminder (from time to time) that respect and goodwill get more done than demanding and intimidation.  

Pastor Tim Adour
Church of the Revelation,
The Bronx, NY 

Epicurean and Stoic: A Look at Emotions in the Christian Life (Tim Adour)

God’s creation is amazing. We often refer to the uniqueness of each snowflake (way too many of them this year), the beauty of a rainbow or the unbelievable feeling when holding a new born in our arms.  “God saw all He created and it was good.”  

Of course, God created the human race and there is much about our divinely created humanity at which to marvel.  One of these things to marvel over is the fact that we are a 3-part being.  We are body, soul and spirit.  There is the physical, emotional/intellectual and eternal part of every person, and He saw that it was good.   

However, just because God created something doesn’t mean we humans use the goodness in it as He intended.  We all know how inappropriately we use our physicality; but, we also have a tendency to be controlled by the emotional side of our character.  It is this emotional aspect of God’s creation I would like to examine briefly.  Lately I’ve been thinking about emotion and how it affects spirituality.  I suggest we leaders need to examine the role of emotion in our spiritual life so that we can accurately train our followers how to properly appropriate emotion in their spirituality.  

In Acts 17 Paul was confronted with the Epicurean and Stoic philosophers of Athens.  Obviously, these were pagans following the teachings of Epicurus and Zeno. However, I suggest we have Epicurean and Stoic style Christianity.  

In my opinion, an Epicurean Christian is one who thinks that the expression of strong emotion, accompanied with a lot of commotion, is true evidence of the work of God in someone’s life.  This group believes the more emotion that expresses itself through the physical part of our creation, the better.  Cry loud, jump high, sing at the top of your lungs, shake when you pray, fall down when you’re prayed for; all of which is evidence of the Spirit of God REALLY moving. 

In my opinion, a Stoic Christian is one who thinks expression of emotion is a sign of spiritual immaturity. The work of the Spirit is accomplished through reflection and contemplation.  Emotional outbursts only distract one from quiet communion with a Holy God.  

I suggest both philosophies are a misuse of what God called good.  To deny or diminish the importance of the emotion God created is to deny or diminish our humanity.  To overemphasize emotional expressions is to turn our emotions into something God never intended.  And when we as leaders promote one philosophy over another we rob our followers of the richness of their divinely created humanity.  

Stoics - read the Psalms.  We’re told to shout, dance and rejoice… That is wonderfully Epicurean.  

Epicureans - read the Psalms.  We’re told to meditate, wait and that God leads us by “quiet waters”… That is wonderfully Stoic.  

The Psalms are not Epicurean or Stoic. They are the inspired word of a Holy God who created our emotions and wants them expressed in their fullness.  

I lean toward Epicurean and need to remind myself to sit and be quiet.  If you lean toward Stoic it wouldn’t hurt to let a healthy shout out every once in a while. Balanced spirituality is both sides of the coin. Let’s stop shushing our people or encouraging extreme expressions…both deny our God given humanity. 

Tim Adour  
Church of the Revelation  
The Bronx, New York 

Trusting People: A Hard Leadership Journey (Tim Adour)

My friend Tim Adour has written a very authentic and vulnerable story about the issue of trust and how difficult it can be for leaders to trust people. Tim shares his struggle and where he is on the journey called Trust. May it move you as much as it did me. Thank-you my friend for sharing your heart on this.  -bkr-

p.s.  Whenever a guest blogger writes, you can always access their former posts by clicking on their name that is in the footer of the post.

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Leaders lead people.  People are complex creatures with many unknown facets.  If the human thought process were viewed as a cave, it would be a cave with many hidden passage ways and dark deep cracks in the wall.  If the human thought process is similar to this type of cave, then there are aspects to the way people think that can/will remain unknown.  If the way people think can never really be fully known, it is possible, perhaps likely, there are some pretty ugly things hidden in the cave.  If there is ugliness hidden, what’s to keep that ugliness from popping out of a crack or hidden passage way?  And if I’m leading people, with these deep dark caves, with possible harmful ugliness waiting in the shadows, what’s to keep me from being the target when that ugliness does pop out? 

The truth is this has happened more times than I care to think about.  In my Leadership Development class I teach that leaders have a target on their chest AND their back.  We can be walking along, whistling a sweet song and the next thing you know someone’s ugliness jumps out of their hidden darkness, we’re being grabbed from behind and we feel sharp pains piercing your back.

What makes this even scarier is that the lurking ugliness is hidden in someone you least expect.  We think we know someone.  We have worked with them, even trusted them, but their ugliness is now gnawing at the back of our neck. After this happens a few times we start to grow eyes in the back of your head.  We start to wonder if we can trust anyone.  We enter into every situation on high alert because we know ugliness will jump at us from somewhere.

Of course, this is a very difficult way to live.  We are always tense.  We cannot relax and it affects every area of our life.  We are always on the edge of “fight or flight”.  We will do one or the other.  Either we are ready to do our quick ninja moves and destroy the ugliness (and the person who has the ugliness) or we sprint out of the area as fast as our feet will take us.  This is a terrible way to live.

Ok, if you’re looking for me to give answers on how to overcome this tension, read another article.  But if you’re looking for someone who understands and who is asking God to help him find peace and balance, I’m your guy and this article is for you.

I do know a few things.
1) Not leading, is not an option,
2) I’m not called to lead cats, so I’m stuck with people,
3) “…the Kingdom of God is righteousness, peace and joy…”  I intend to have all the righteousness, peace and joy heaven offers,
4) THIS IS THE BIG ONE…Jesus understands.

John 2:24 says, “But Jesus would not entrust himself to them, for he knew all men.”  Verse 23 tells us that this refers to those who “believed His name.”  Jesus knew there was ugliness hidden in the caves of those who said they believed in Him.  In fact, He withheld Himself because of this. 

However, Jesus loved/loves everyone, even those He couldn’t trust. 

My friends, I have not yet found the place Jesus did. 

There is a place where we can protect ourselves from the ugliness of people’s caves and still love them unconditionally.  There is place we can withhold part of ourselves from those we lead and still invest in them.  There is a place where we are justified in not trusting, but not moving into a critical, dark suspicious mentality. 

Where is this place?  I’m still looking, but God is faithful and I want to lead people; and I know the Holy Spirit will work in my life and teach me what I need to learn so that I can be where Jesus was in this regard. 

Jesus, I cry out to you for myself and all of us who are weary of the ugly attacks.  I ask that you take us to that secret place where you heal the wounds and teach us to be more like you.  Jesus, we want to lead your people in love and compassion, but we’re tired and edgy.  Let your Kingdom rule in our hearts.  We need your righteousness, peace and joy.  Jesus, you understand so I submit myself to my Teacher.  In Your name, Amen.  

Rev. Tim Adour
Church of the Revelation
The Bronx, New York
Website for Church of the Revelation, Bronx, New York

More Accountability

Tim Adour writes about an important issue that is close to his heart. He doesn't pull any punches. If you ever hear  Tim preach, you quickly hear that he has the heart and passion of a prophet.  This is a timely word.  Thanks my friend. And may we be counted in the number of those who finish well.

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I am really beginning to hate being reminded of Robert Clinton’s stats on how many leaders fail to finish well.  As you know, Clinton says only about 30% of leaders actually end well.  Of course, we know that most failures are the result of struggles with sex, money, power and pride.  When will we learn?  When will we leaders stop dancing on the edge of the cliff and learn to run from the cliff?  Why do we think we are the exception and that “it cannot happen to me”?  Why must we prove Robert Clinton right?  Wouldn’t it be nice to say, Clinton’s stats no longer apply?  

I know my questions take a leap into the absurd.  Leaders are going to fall, fail and not end well until the Second Coming; however, is it too much hope that in the Christian world we leaders can be wise and not stupid?  Stupid people don’t learn from their mistakes, smart people do learn from their mistakes, but wise people learn from other’s mistakes.  Why must we Christian leaders be so stupid?

Where is all this coming from?  It comes from a deep, deep sadness and a burning desire not to screw this life, and life of leadership, up. Having recently watched the foolish actions of two leaders explode in their faces, I’ve been in another season of self-reflection and sincere crying out to God for His grace and wisdom. 

My office is in the Bronx, NY.  One thing we have in the Bronx is a lot of sirens.  After hearing the news of these two leaders, I’m sitting in my office hearing siren after siren, sinking deeper and deeper into the pit of despair.  I felt like there was no hope.  It always seems like things end in an emergency and the casualties just keep mounting.  When will the emergency vehicle be coming for me?  When will my life crash and burn?  How much longer do I have before I do something that won’t allow me to end well?  These men loved God and led God’s people.  Yet, they ended up needing emergency services, and I don’t know if they will recover. When will the sirens come for me?

And then, the Holy Spirit showed up in my office.  He began to speak peace and I began to think more clearly.  I realized the greatest factor in ending well, other than prayer and the Word, is ACCOUNTABILITY!  I’ve written on this before, but the importance of it has resurfaced.  I can pray until I’m blue in the face (we Pentecostals can actually do this), I can read the Word for hours at a time, but without accountability to another human being my chances of ending well diminish.  

Why? Because secrecy is the devil’s playground.  Don’t share your struggles of the mind, you can’t trust people.  Don’t worry about it, you’re stronger than that.  It’s no big deal, everyone struggles with the same issue…you’ll be fine.  Be careful, you don’t want people thinking you’re not as spiritual as they perceive. The devil is a liar and we believe his lies.  

I’ve realized something else.  Some say they have accountability partners, but their partners are people in different towns, states, even countries.  How can they hold us accountable?  They never see us.  They know only what we tell them.  Who do we have who is “in our face”?  We do we have who is not intimidated by us and who will say, “knock it off, that’s not healthy’?   

Here in the Bronx, and perhaps in other places, there is a saying.  Even my 6 granddaughter says it.  Its 2 simple words...MAN UP!  It simply means, stop being a wimp.  Stop making excuses. Just do what you’re supposed to do.  

The bible says the same thing in James 5:16.  Therefore confess your sins to one other, pray for each other so that you may be healed.  Let’s put our unhealthy thoughts out there.  Let’s admit our struggles.  Let’s give people permission to speak into our lives and pray for us.  Man up!  Admit, expose, repent, grow.  Let Robert Clinton’s stats lose their value.  

Rev. Tim Adour
Website for Church of the Revelation, Bronx, New York

Developing Leaders in the Local Church (Tim Adour)

My friend Tim Adour got the leadership bug a bunch of years ago. When I say he got the bug, I mean two things. He got the bug to grow as far as he could as a leader. And then he got the bug to develop others for leadership. So, here is Tim, the senior pastor of a large Assembly of God church in the Bronx, and he gives some of his very best time doing leadership development. 

Tim recently made a comment on FACEBOOK about one of his evening training programs (on appreciative inquiry - good stuff) and I asked Tim if he would tell the readers of this site a little about the training programs he runs for leaders at his church.

-bkr-

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Question: What do you do when you have dozens of quality local church leaders who have a passion for their area of ministry, have been leading that ministry for years, want to see that ministry prosper, but are not sure how to get where they know they want to go? 

Answer: Train them.

Recently I heard someone say, “The church is one of the few organizations that give people leadership positions, but do not train them properly.  I would suggest this is a true statement.  Certainly, the church is full of loving, dedicated and sacrificial people; however, these qualities, by themselves, do not make a leader.

I would further suggest that local church senior leadership enable an atmosphere that tolerates non-trained leadership roles.  Due to our own lack of training, failure to recognize the need for training or an overloaded schedule we do not provide instruction that would enhance the overall ministry of the local church. 

Before I say anything further, let me admit my past guilt in this regard.  In my case, I didn’t see the value in investment in other leaders, or myself for that matter; therefore, I was content with filling positions, not developing skilled leaders.  I thank God He put people in my life that helped me overcome such a notion.

Over the past few years there is a 3-pronged approach I’ve followed in training local church leadership.  1) Personal Leadership.  2) Leadership Development. 3) Good to Great. 
 

Personal Leadership

The idea behind this class is we cannot lead anyone until we have first learned to lead ourselves.  In my opinion, the first place to start in self-leadership is personal holiness.  Too many of God’s people live under the philosophy of “Situational Holiness.”  Situational Ethics bases right and wrong on what is happening at the moment.  Situational Holiness picks and chooses what biblical principles I’ll follow based on convenience.  Obviously, this leads to an undisciplined life of holiness before God.  Therefore, we spend several weeks reading and discussing Jerry Bridges’ book, The Pursuit of Holiness.  It is one of the most practical books on holiness I have read. 
 

Leadership Development

This course continues the self-evaluation theme of Personal Leadership, but addresses specific aspects of leadership.  We begin with the subject, Permission to Fail.  God is not looking for perfection, just commitment.  We then move into a lengthy discussion of Brian Rice’s Four Mindsets of a Leader.  We will spend 2, maybe 3 weeks reviewing this material.  Finally, we move into the practical realities of Dream big, Plan well, Work hard and Leave the rest in God’s hands. 

 

Good to Great

The previous 2 courses are geared for just about anyone.  Those in leadership or those who are thinking about leadership will glean from the above 2 programs.  Good to Great is much more intense and is for those serious about becoming great leaders.  Of course, we use Jim Collins’ book, Good to Great.  However, we filter this book through scripture.  We begin the course with a discussion about “All truth is God’s truth.”  We then methodically go through Collins’ book and discuss all the principles that can be validated by scripture.  Believe it or not, most of the book presents godly principles.  It is quite an experience.  

 

Tim Adour
Church of the Revelation
Bronx, New York

 

Developing Leaders in the Ukraine (Tim Adour)

On June 16-21 Tim Adour was in Paltava, Ukraine conducting a leadership seminar for Ukrainian and Russian leaders.  Each day 150 leaders gathered together, under a tent, to discuss the thought and spiritual life of the leader.  Below is a brief report of Tim’s trip.

By the way, Tim apologized for the picture quality, using the same excuse I do . . . photography is not an area of strength!

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It was a wonderful and unique experience.  Many churches in the area do not own a building and rent prices are very high.  To save money, the organizers pitched a tent in an open field.  Some leaders stayed in a small hotel down the road, others brought their own tents for their accommodations.  Arrangements for electricity, bathroom facilities and running water had to be put in place.   It was quite an undertaking.  What all this shows is the hunger to learn.  I was thoroughly impressed with the dedication of these leaders.

The subject matter took an unexpected twist.  As is true all over the world, sexual immorality and financial improprieties are not uncommon.  Within the first 2 hours of the seminar questions on these two topics came up.  The result was 2 days of discussing scriptural and practical boundaries to avoid becoming just another causality.  In fact, there were several times the conversation became so blunt I wasn’t sure people wouldn’t get upset.  However, the opposite happened.  

Questions and comments flowed and expressions of gratitude were plenty.  What a beautiful thing to see leaders longing to remain pure and holy before God.   (Tim pictured speaking.)

In addition to the leadership seminar, they arranged for evening services.  They turned up the volume in the tent so people in the city could hear and I preached the gospel for 2 nights.  The numbers of those accepting Christ was small, but heaven rejoices when one sinner turns.  Of course, we know many seeds were planted.  May the Holy Spirit water each seed for a future harvest. 

Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation

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I am struck by the fact that two of the issues mentioned by Bobby Clinton, as reasons why leaders don't finish well, were the main themes these leaders were dealing with:  Sex and Money.

 I also appreciate the fact that while Tim took about 100 pages of notes to talk about other leadership matters, he ditched the notes and ministered in the area of their immediate need.

Thanks my friend.

-bkr-

Church of the Revelation and Tim Adour

I spent Saturday and Sunday with my very good friend Tim Adour and his delightful wife and ministry partner - Diana. They are pastors at Church of the Revelation (Bronx). They took me around the city (it has been a loooonnnnggg time since I have been to the City). We had a great meal in China Town, visited Ground Zero, Times Square, walked a bit on the Brooklyn Bridge, a quick foray into Central Park... a fun time.  I spoke at their three services on Sunday.  8:00, 10:30 and 1:00!

I first met Tim in 1997, about eight months after I moved to New York to be senior pastor at First Baptist Church of Homer. Tim was the senior pastor of Church of the Resurrection (in Syracuse). It was one of those "divine appointments" when God brings someone into your life that, at the time, you have no idea how significant the relationship will be.

Tim became "a friend that is closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24) and as the years have gone on, that friendship has deepened. Unfortunately, my move away from New York meant we just don't see each other as much as we use to.

We have so many mutual passions. God, the church of Christ, world missions, leadership development, music (the good rock and roll kind), life long learning, personal growth, our sense of humor is equally warped . . . you get the picture.

Tim had been overseas twice for LCI, teaching graduate courses. He also travels for other teaching engagements to different countries. Tim just returned from teaching in the Ukraine at a Pastor's Conference. You'll hear some of his experiences and observations in about a week.

We have walked with each other through some very dark times. We have celebrated incredible God moments. There is no need to pretend with one another. We know when to speak a word to one another and we know when to listen and not say a word. It's good.

Tim moved to the Bronx about 18 months ago to be the senior pastor of Church of the Revelation in the Bronx. It is a great city church. It is large and growing. They have a great worship team and a choir that (in my opinion) is every bit as good as the Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir. I was blown away listening to them. Wow!

I was really hit by the mind-boggling needs of the city. Take a moment today and pray for Tim and Diana and their staff and for the ministry of Church of the Revelation.

And here is a fun video blog that Tim did.

Blessings my friend.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

14 Questions

Tim Adour sent me this right after he was back from Paraguay. This was some of the stuff that Tim was processing and then presenting to others. These questions are not the kind you give a yes/no to. Get out a notebook or journal. Write them down. Print them out. Paste them in. And start reflecting and writing.

If you want to watch a really good movie on this theme - check out The Apostle.

Better yet . . . find a trusted friend and do it together.  

Thanks Tim..... 

 -bkr-

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In preparation for a trip to Asuncion Paraguay, I read Wayne Goodall’s book Why Great Men Fall (2005).  Goodall suggests that leaders honestly answer 14 questions.  According to Goodall, our answers determine the possibility of failing as a leader.  What are our answers?

1.     Do I feel a sense of entitlement?  “I deserve my position because of who I am and what I do.”

2.     Am I a gifted entrepreneur, but my life is out of balance?  What are my priorities? 

3.     Do I have the ability to compartmentalize my moral choices?  Can I do something wrong and then mentality put it aside, while I do something right?

4.     Do I expect my followers to keep quiet if I do questionable things?

5.     Am I a “high risk” person who loves the adrenaline rush of danger or compromise? Such people are easily bored and tend to take risks they should not.

6.     Am I a magnet for women/men? Do they love my power, money, influence, and personality?

7.     Is my integrity in check?  What is my reputation when it comes to integrity? 

8.     Am I surrounded with “yes men” with very little accountability?

9.     Do I compromise my conscience? 

10.  Who is my mentor?  Who am I a mentor to?  Do I mentor the opposite sex?

11.  Do I play by my own rules?  Do I have an ethical code?

12.  Do I handle stress in a healthy way?

13.  Are my moods under control?

14.  Have I found a balance with money, sex, and power?

Perhaps we should take these questions into our prayer closet and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal any self-deception with any of the above questions.  

Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation, Bronx, New York

There is Always, At Least, One (Tim Adour)

Certainly, I have not learned all there is to learn about leadership.  To think otherwise would be foolish.  However, with no arrogance intended, I do know how to lead.  I have raised 2 kids who are now productive members of society.  Throughout the years I have been an athletic coach, a church planting coach and staff development coach.  Presently I lead a vibrant, growing, inner city church.  In addition, I continue to travel the globe offering leadership training and assistance.  Of course, many of you reading this article have done and are doing much than what I’ve mentioned.  The point is I, and you, know how to lead. 

I am grateful to God for all He has enabled me to learn about leadership.  Without the skills and talents He has gifted us with, we would not be leaders.  But, I am also grateful to God for what I do not know about leadership.  Although what I do not know is something I eventually want to know, the lack of knowledge is a gift. 

My inability to lead in certain areas is probably one of the greatest blessings God has bestowed upon me.  Not knowing what I’m doing enhances my relationship with Him.  Why?  Because not knowing what I’m I doing keeps me on my knees.  Over the years, I have seen God’s mercy in giving me, at least, one area of my leadership where I am at a total loss; at least one area of my leadership where I must go to my knees and seek His face for wisdom, grace and understanding.   

I make this point for all of us driven, determined, fast paced leaders who do not like to get bogged down.  I am well aware of the frustration in having to slow down because of trying to figure out whether to turn right or left.  I have often said (unfortunately, only half joking), “Waiting for anything is a waste of time.”  

I remember well wanting to hire a new staff person.  The process was laborious.  Just reviewing the resumes was enough to cause me to scream.  So, when my driven, determined, fast paced leadership kicked in, I rushed out and hire the one who looked the best.  Come on, I know how to lead.  Just make a decision and go with it.  The poor guy I hired…he last 8 weeks and I looked really stupid.  God had offered a brilliant opportunity to go to my knees, but I did not take advantage of that privilege. 

If we cannot recognize, at least, one area of our leadership that requires being on our knees seeking direction, we probably will end up with an “8-week wonder”, and most likely, will look stupid. 

We know how to lead.  We know how to make decisions.  We know what needs to be done.  We know what we want to see accomplished.  But the truth is, this a terrible place to be in because it can keep us from our knees.  God always will give us, at least, one area of our leadership that requires “knee time”, but will our fast paced leadership style recognize it?  I don’t know, maybe I am just preachin’ to myself.  If so, writing this article is helping me remember I don’t know all I think I know.  

Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation, Bronx, New York

In Conflict With Who I Am (Tim Adour)

A few months ago, Tim Adour mentioned to me that he had been very moved by a book on conflict and peace-making. It has occupied his thinking since then and he just sent a brief summary of four different responses to conflict.

I've attached it as a PDF.

Download In_conflict_who_am_I

The book that has been important for Tim is: Making Peace: A Guide to Overcoming Church Conflict by Jim Van Yperen.

You may want to check this book out.

This is some of the important work of leadership.

Thanks Tim.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

Leading In Pain

Here is a powerful and intimate story from my friend Tim. I greatly admire him for sharing it and the lessons God taught him through it. I had the privilge of being one of those friends to whom Tim "screamed."  This is the kind of stuff that Christ uses to shape those who become Level Five leaders. (Brian)

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Leading in Pain

Anyone who has accidently grabbed or bumped into anything hot resulting in a burn will understand what I say next.  The other day I accidently poured boiling water on my hand.  Although it was not a severe burn, it hurt.  Even though the boiling water splashed only on my hand, it affected my entire body.  That horrible sting that doesn’t seem to ever stop radiating through my whole body.  I am distracted from everything else around me.  Pain is a major distraction.

Several years ago, this principle hit my family hard.  Here are some things that happened in a three year period.  First: My wife almost died in Ethiopia. That story is so complex and painful I can’t begin to tell you the details. She is thousands of miles away and I can do nothing!  By God’s grace and miraculous intervention she lived. But the side effects of that event lasted two more years. 

Then:  My mother and niece were in a car accident resulting in my niece being permanently paralyzed from the waist down. 

Next:  My son faced such a traumatic event in his life, it required quitting college for a period of time.  I do not remember ever crying as much as I did during those years.  I sit here today and cringe as I remember the pain.  But, I am also very grateful to God.  His grace was and is sufficient. 

During this time I was the pastor of a strong, thriving church.  There were all sorts of wonderful things happening in those years.   On one hand, these good things gave me something to look forward to. However, all these things required my leadership attention.  I certainly had quality people around me, who kept things going, but I was the senior leader and hundreds of people were looking to me to lead them where God was taking us. 

The problem:  I was severely distracted.  My heart was crushed with pain.  I cried for and with my wife.  I cried for and with my niece and her family.  I cried for and with my son.  I never knew the human body and soul had so many tears in it.  In the midst of all this crying the phone never stopped ringing, the appointments never came to an end, the church problems continued to come across my desk, and the staff continued to want input and counsel.  The pain was so intense I was distracted from all else, and yet, there was no choice.  I had to continue to lead. 

Accountability (Tim Adour)

Tim Adour writes about an issue that is extremely important in light of the fact that so many Christian leaders don't finish well.  I've been friends with Tim for a long time and I can tell you, that Tim practices what he "preaches" about the theme of accountability.  (Brian Rice, LCI)

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Accountability is not a thrilling topic of conversation.  In fact, it rarely comes up, especially among leaders.  The exception to this is when we are talking about someone being accountable to us.  I suggest we leaders need accountability as much, if not more, than everyone else.  I won’t take time to get into details, but we all know the dangers of leadership.  So, how do we protect ourselves?  One of the main ways is accountability.  Let me put it in the form of a question. Do we want to crash and burn or soar like an eagle?  The Apostle Paul tells us in I Cor. 10:12, “Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall.”  Lord Jesus, help us.  Again I ask, do we want to crash and burn or soar like an eagle?  Without accountability you will not soar. 

 

 

Allow me to share with you some thoughts I struggled with before I finally made myself accountable.  “I can handle it.  I don’t need to talk to someone.  I don’t want people knowing my business.  I don’t want people telling me what to do.  It’s really no big deal.  I’m not as bad as others I know.”  All of these statements are warning signs that a crash and burn is soon to occur. 

 

 

If there is an area in our life that seems to take over and we can’t find the strength to subdue it, we need to be accountable.  Unfortunately, fooling ourselves into thinking it will just go away is one of the most dangerous things we can do.  Please let us stop justifying our actions.  Please let us stop pretending its “no big deal”.  Please let us stop toying with the grace of God.  Become accountable or crash and burn.

 

 

It’s important to define the word “accountable”.  Webster defines accountable as “being answerable.”  Although it is a good place to start, accountability is not just finding a friend and saying, “I’m having a hard time.  Will you please pray for me?”  Accountability is also finding a mature, experienced pillar in the Kingdom of God and submitting to them.  It’s telling this person about our struggles and allowing them to speak whatever they need to into our life.  It’s letting this warrior of the Faith ask us the hard questions and receive their correction and guidance, without resentment.

 

 

Leaders, let us take heed.  Why do we choose secrecy?  Secrecy, justification, ignoring, and rebellion will result in a fall far greater than any embarrassment there may be in making ourselves accountable.  God wants us to soar.  Let us do whatever we must to soar.  Let us become accountable. 

 

 

Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation

 

Check Out Church of the Rev website.

I Want a Gift

Tim Adour offers a reflection that is especially relevant to this time of our year. As I read it, it brought to my mind the words of James 1:17.

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

May Tim's longing be our longing as well.

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It is no secret I love getting gifts.  I am well aware of the fact Jesus said, it is more blessed to give than to receive, but I still love getting gifts.  I know, I know; I need to be more spiritual and allow a greater work of the Spirit in my life. Ok fine...but don’t forget I still love getting gifts.  So do you, you just want to be seen as more spiritual so you won’t admit it. 

I’ve been on an interesting journey.  It has been a journey of self examination; which has brought some, good and not so good things to light.  On the one hand, I have noticed growth for which I am grateful.  However, there are some bad things that really annoy me because they are issues I have been struggling with for years.  As I said, it’s been interesting. 

 

 

After several months of frustration I have finally come to a conclusion-God has everything I need to change and grow into the man He wants me to be.   I suppose someone could say, “Da, you should have figured that out a long time ago”.  But, you know, it never occurred to me the way it has recently.

 

 

Here is what I’ve started doing and I am amazed at the results.  I have asked God to give me gifts.  I have identified specific areas of weakness and continual struggle and I have asked God to help me change thought processes and give me whatever I need to overcome.  At the same time, I have identified specific “good” areas that need to increase and have asked God to help me prosper even further. 

 

 

I guess what I’ve done is combine II Peter 1:3 and John 16:24.  Peter tells us “…that God has given us everything pertaining to life and godliness”, and John tells us to “ask and we will receive”.    You know, praying scripture works.  God delights in fulfilling His word for His people.  It’s just a matter of His people taking Him at His word.  I have a long way to go, but I love the gifts God has given so far.

 

I love getting gifts and I intend on continuing to ask God to bestow on me all the gifts He wants, so that I will become all He wants me to be. 

 

Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation

 

 

The Art of Self-Deception (Tim Adour)

Tim Adour's post this month is on a crucial issue. It is the capacity we all have for self-deception. Tim was moved to write this through a great leadership book he recently read: Leadership and Self-Deception by the Arbinger Institute.

Tim, thanks for your very vulnerable window into this issue.

Brian Rice

Leadership ConneXtions International

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The Art of Self-Deception

My artisitic abilities are severely limited. The best I can do is stick figures and sad looking trees. I envy those who can draw and paint.

However, I do possess the incredible talent of blame shifting. I have the ability to take any problem I hve created and sculpt it in such a way that all attention is taken off of me and points the finger at anyone I choose -- usually my wife. It is a great talent. The skill in which I work my craft is astonishing. I think I will start art classes in this craft because I'm sure there are others who would want to learn my proficiency. . . .

To read the rest of this one page reflection click on the link.

Download Art_of_Self-Deception_Tim_Adour.pdf

Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation

 

Stupid, Smart or Wise

Yesterday my friend Tim Adour took the train from New York City to come down to Lancaster for a few hour session on mapping out a course he is teaching for LCI in November in Santiago. It was great hanging out with Tim for a few hours. We spent our time at the Prince Street Cafe.

Here is a biblical reflection on leadership from Pastor Tim Adour

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Stupid, Smart or Wise

This title is a simple yet profound little saying.  Actually, the whole saying is this: There are three kinds of people in this world.  Stupid people who don’t learn from their mistakes, Smart people who do learn from their mistakes and Wise people who learn from other people’s mistakes. 

How many times have we been stupid?  How many times do we repeat our mistakes only to sit down later and deal with the feelings of guilt and stupidity?  Israel was stupid when they left Egypt.  They complained and complained and complained.  Each time God showed Himself faithful and yet they continued to complain.  The result was a whole generation missing the blessing of God.  They didn’t learn and they suffered the consequences. 

 

On the other hand, King David was smart.  Although he made a big mistake by sinning with Bathsheba, he learned from his mistake.  Psalm 51 is David’s cry of repentance and from that point on, we do not hear of David making the same mistake. 

 

What David learned was, the consequences are far too costly to repeat that kind of mistake.  The child produced by his sin with Bathsheba died.  David learned that to disobey God’s commandments always comes with a heavy price.  He made the mistake once, but he was smart.  He repented and didn’t make the mistake again. 

 

Smart is good, but wise is better.  King Josiah was wise.  In 2 Kings 22 we see the lost book of the Law being found.  Up until this point Judah had not been following all the commands of God.  They were in disobedience. 

 

However, when the book of the Law was found and the contents were read, King Josiah made changes immediately.  He said in v. 13, "Our fathers have not listened to the words of this book, to do according to all that is written concerning us."  What Josiah was saying was, our ancestors made a big mistake and we are not going to repeat their mistake.  That is wisdom. 

 

Listen to what 2 Kings 23:25 says:  “Before him [Josiah] there was no king like him who turned to the Lord with all his heart and with all his soul and with all his might, according to all the law of Moses; nor did any like him arise after him.” 

 

Josiah was extremely wise.  He saw the mistakes of others, determined in his heart not to be like those who came before and implemented practical steps to avoid making those same mistakes. 

What are we?  Stupid, Smart or Wise?  God help us be wise.

 

Rev. Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation

Ambition (Tim Adour)

Tim Adour has been a very good friend of mine ever since 1996 when I moved up to New York to be the senior at the (then) First Baptist Church of Homer (and now Grace Church of Cortland). Tim was pastoring Church of the Resurrection in Syracuse and I met him through a senior pastors group we were part of.  (Started by another good friend - Doug Bullock, pastor of Eastern Hills Bible church) Tim and I hit if off very quickly.

Tim and his wife Diana are now pastoring at  Church of the  Revelation in the Bronx, New York. It is a multi-ethnic Assembly of God church. Tim has a passion for leadership development and cross cultural missions and is leading a new leadership work at his new church. He is just starting a Ph.D. in leadership. In addition to his other international travel, Tim also does one leadership training trip a year for Leadership ConneXtions. I've asked Tim if he would do a monthly leadership reflection for all the readers of this blog. Here is the first one from Tim.  (Thank-you my friend, for friendship and for partnership.   Brian)

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I was skimming through a website that has several quotes from Jim Collins and I came across one that grabbed me.

Collins says,

"Level 5 leaders are differentiated from other levels of leaders in that they have a wonderful blend of personal humility combined with extraordinary professional will. Understand that they are very ambitious; but their ambition, first and foremost, is for the company's success. They realize that the most important step they must make to become a Level 5 leader is to subjugate their ego to the company's performance."  You can find it here.

We tend to think of ambition as something negative. This word carries with it the idea of running over people and getting what you can, no matter the cost. The fact is the word ambition is not a bad word. It means an earnest desire for some sort of achievement. A great example is Jesus.  He was one of the most ambitious people the world has ever known. He was determined to achieve salvation for all those who would accept His forgiveness. Nothing was going to get in His way. However, who was more compassionate and loving than He was? Even though Jesus was driven to achieve His goal, He touched the leper, ate with sinners, loving spoke to the woman at the well and forgave those who tortured Him.

Ambition is that drive that pushes us to succeed when obstacles block our path.  Ambition creates that confidence we need to ignore the naysayers and continue to pursue the dream.  Ambition produces the motivation that drives us on, when just about everything else around us says stop.  The balance to this determination is that it must not be ego driven.  Collins uses the word subjugate when referring to the leader’s ego.  Interestingly, the thesaurus allows the word crush as a substitute for subjugate.  Ambition, for the leader, is about being a transformational leader who is concerned about their followers and not their ego.  Who had the right to exalt Himself more than Jesus?  Yet, Philippians 2 tells He humbled Himself becoming a servant.   Let us be ambitious, like Jesus was ambitious. 

Tim Adour

Church of the Revelation Website